Yep... I'm an absolute geek for a musical. This title is from Wicked (where my FABULOUS daughter is taking me in October in NYC!) and is a song about how other people perceive your actions -- it's a truly fascinating song and I love to sing it in the car. Jenny prefers "Defying Gravity" and "Dancing Through Life", but once in awhile, I insist. She's 2 and I control the CD player ('cept it's hard to hear MY songs if she's throwing a fit).
Anyway... this title describes how I have been feeling for weeks and certainly since the Heat from the Fires of Hell set in on Saturday. I'm like a hamster on a freakin' wheel or the Energizer Bunny. Days pass and speed by and I suddenly look up and say "it's Friday?!" I am incapable of saying "no" to a volunteer task -- even when I know that the person asking hates me and will be mean to me for no reason other than that I get the volunteer task done. If I have food poisoning (or a stomach bug or WHATEVER that was last Wednesday) and I can't make a meeting, I feel guilt in the extreme because I have volunteered to do a job and it MUST get done. When people complain about being asked to do ONE or two things and respond "I can't commit," despite the fact that EVERYONE else does 10 times the work, I want to smack them -- I resist the urge, but I get furious. I have SO much work to do and files to review and briefs to write and clients to yell at for failing to communicate with me. Gas costs too much money and there is NO short term solution (despite what anyone from any political party tells you -- it's crap). People drive like complete maniacs. Did I mention I hate the heat?!
I equate sanity with knitting time and stay up late even if I have early court just to "give" myself some peace. Of course, I also knit in court (between the six hearings I did today), at restaurants, at the swim club and anywhere else I happen to be. I was so tired today after the hearings -- the heat wipes me out when it is anything much over 80; 114 heat index today was not tolerable -- and Jenny was still going to be napping. I went to Crafty Me Yarns and sat on the floor in my white suit, pulled out my Booga Bag and aimlessly knit and chatted with the owner for somewhere around an hour. I was finally and simply dysfunctional. The bag is going to be cool though!
"If I cannot succeed, Fiero, saving you, I promise no good deed will I ever doooooooo..... A-GAIN"
OK.... ready to go to bed now. Have more court in morning.