The Crafty Lawyer

2011 in retrospect

2011-11-28T08:58:00.000-05:00

The following post is from my facebook page on Thanksgiving morning. I realized that I hadn't posted here in forever, but since the FB post sums the whole year up well, I am simply copying it here verbatim...

My turkey is in the oven so I get to reflect on the past year.... long post alert; feel free to read or not.

On Thanksgiving 2010, we were lucky enough to have our Airman son, Mark Jr., home for the holiday because my sister-in-law, Laura, had just married her new husband, Tim. That wedding brought everyone in our family who mattered together and added a new niece and nephew (Brenna and Bill) to our RIDICULOUS brood. We were planning Melissa & Mike's wedding. It was a time of celebration and fun. A few short days later, Ryan would tear his MCL and Chip would tear a tendon in his foot. The next six months or so were consumed with injury, rehab and frustration as Ryan tried to grasp (at not quite 10 years old) that he was NOT unbreakable. He had a very tough 6-9 months, including an appendectomy in March and a random virus in June that caused more weight loss. Those same next six months would bring decisions: whether to send Jenny to private school, whether I should run for local judge, whether we should keep Ryan IN public school... as 2010 moved to 2011, a lot was in the air.

I learned a lot in early 2011. After deciding very reluctantly to run against a long-term MDJ because another candidate was doing so anyway, I was suddenly told that as a county solicitor, I was not "allowed" to have any political activity at all. Now that's funny since I replaced an OCY solicitor who became a judge, but that was what I was told. On Feb. 28th, I was forced to make a split second decision about whether to give up my professional dream of becoming a local judge OR whether to stay as a solicitor for Children & Youth. Despite being the more qualified candidate (I have a four year college degree AND a law degree AND I've lived in Whitpain for 40 years AND I'm a practicing attorney), it was obvious that the local powers-that-be wanted the other candidate (NOT the sitting judge). In an instant, I made the decision that has, in retrospect, been the best thing that ever happened to me. My job at OCY matters to me -- it is thankless in the extreme; it is stressful; it is emotionally-draining and it is WAY more time-consuming than the two days a week for which I am paid -- but the job I do matters to the children and families of Montgomery County and I love my co-workers who are the most dedicated group of individuals I could ever hope to meet. If someone were to offer me the MDJ spot now because the newly-elected judge was unable to serve, I would accept that position (I would LOVE to be MDJ and would be qualified for the job), but I would NOT sacrifice the family time that I have gained because I am not "allowed" to be involved in any political activity. My life is blessed because I cannot be political and that frees up time for my children and myself.

Good thing too... Ryan and Jenny are keeping us HOPPING. They attend two different schools (because we were NOT going to expose Jenny to the lowest common denominator theory of education; she's just too bright). Both have progressed in karate -- Jenny with one green stripe and Ryan with his green belt as a result of REALLY hard rehab, new maturity and old-fashioned hard work. Both kids swim almost year round -- Jenny is adorable at 5 in her second winter of competitive swimming and Ryan is starting to bloom in the pool as he adjusts to his new height, applies his karate maturity to his swimming and is starting to be very competitive both as an individual and for his team. Jenny also does dance after school at Gwynedd-Mercy Academy and she wants to add t-ball this Spring. Ryan plays his clarinet, sings in chorus and does Chess Club, all while doing VERY well in school (we're still TRYING to keep him in public school but that is a decision-in-progress). I cannot begin to express my pride in Ryan in particular this year -- he had to deal with a LOT of trials and he has come through with flying colors. At not-quite 11, he is FAR from where he wants to be (or where he can be), but he has learned the value of positive thinking and perseverance and hard work. Mark and I, quite literally on some evenings, tag out the kids to get them to everything -- it is, in a word, INSANE. It's also something my children would not be able to do if I had stayed in the political arena in order to run for an office for which I was the most qualified candidate but which I was never going to be allowed to obtain. I am blessed because God works in strange ways -- by stepping out of politics, my life has become filled with the joy of my children's accomplishments.

My older kids are thriving... 2011 gave me a new son-in-law who I could not love more if he was my own. Melissa is about to hit her five year mark at the Clerk of Court's Office. Chip will get teaching tenure and his Master's Degree in 2012. Mark Jr. was promoted to Sr. Airman and continues to advance in the military, serve his country and travel around Europe. I am thankful he has not been deployed and grateful for his service to our country. As a parent, a person is judged (whether we admit it or not) by how their adult children turn out -- Mark and I must have done SOMETHING right and we are VERY blessed by our older kids and enjoy spending time with them when it can be "scheduled" I miss Mark Jr. terribly today -- holidays for military parents and families are TOUGH -- but I am so proud of all SIX of my children that I consider the centerpiece of my life.

I am also ridiculously proud of my husband, Mark, who realized HIS professional goal this year when he was made Chairman of the Science Department at North Penn High School. Sometimes, qualifications, dedication and long-term effort count. NPHS is very lucky to have my husband and I never stop saying how blessed I am to have a true Life Partner. The other day, Mark said it best: "we keep each other's heads above water sometimes." There is no challenge that I have faced in the past 20+ years that has not been made easier because of my incredible husband and best friend.

As God closed certain doors, and as each of us progresses as individuals through this maze called LIFE, people we thought were friends drop by the wayside. Sometimes, that's because a person did something that I find causes a permanent separation (not a fight... why bother?) and sometimes it is a natural progression based in shared activities or lack thereof. 2011 took a few people from my life for a variety of reasons (luckily, no major family losses for once !) but my life is still full because God always opens a window. My life is blessed with my WingSisters, my knitting friends, my Woman's Club group and my closest friends who I know WILL come to a wedding for which they have RSVP's yes (if you've said you're coming to an event and you are NOT in the hospital, send a quick text that you won't be coming -- rudeness is NOT ok). I schedule lunch dates with Kim (and Louis too). Cara and I started 2011 by freezing our BUTTS off at the Eagle/Packers playoff game and we still try to make time for each other (especially on our spa days !). The other members of the Ambler GKK dojo are my sanity and my rock -- some Mondays after Court, I really NEED to be punching and kicking ! The other swimming parents (Summer and Winter) who, along with Mark and I, "get it" when we talk about the need to be in a HOT, chlorine-infused pool balcony at 6:45 a.m. on Saturday AND Sunday mornings so our kids can improve their swimming times. My kids' fantastic teachers, instructors and coaches -- Krystle, MaryAnn, Jessica, Alex, Chris, Bruce, Mike, Barbie, Josh, Dan, Brad and ALL of the GKK black belts (I still can't believe that, at almost 48, I not only have a green belt, but a couple of brown stripes on it !! You all have SO much more faith in my abilities than I do). And my incredible OCY co-workers: George, Maria, Joanna, Rose, Erin, Jen, Laura, Laurie, Marilou, Kerri, Liz, Maryann, Suzanne and ALL of the caseworkers and support staff. Last, but not least, my extended family -- Laura, Laura, Gayle, Tim, Ira, Joe and a BOATLOAD of nieces, nephews and cousins. I am particularly thankful that my mom, at almost 80, will be sitting at my Thanksgiving table in a few hours. I am blessed with the fullness of my professional and personal life, beyond measure.

As I end 2011 and look forward to 2012, I am in a different place than I thought I would be when I reflected a year ago. I work hard (with a full time law firm and a part time solicitor job), but I play more. I laugh more and spend more time doing charitable work, volunteering NON-politically, crafting, knitting, designing cards and scrapbook pages, making candy (which I don't eat!) and sharing my life. God, Goddess, the Universe... whatever greater power controls my life... has taken me on a meandering path to where I need to be at this moment. Forty years ago, my parents moved us into the house in which I still reside. Thirty years ago, my knee went BOOM and changed my path. Fifteen years ago (ok, almost 16), I opened my own law firm. As I approach my late 40's, I know that I am where I am supposed to be right now. There is a lot to be said for being content. For that, I am very thankful.

From the Keagy Clan to all of you... HAPPY THANKSGIVING !!!!!!

February 2011 -- Moving Forward

2011-02-08T11:16:00.000-05:00

For weeks now, I have put my "Birthday Resolution post" on hold and this is not that post although it is related to it. I wanted to have the chance to speak to MDJ Murray directly before making this announcement and I had that opportunity earlier this morning. An "official" announcement will be forthcoming along with the formation of a committee and the opening of a facebook page (and a bank account and appointment of managers, etc.), but this is my pseudo-official announcement that I will begin circulating petitions next week for the office of Magisterial District Judge for district 38-1-21. The district is comprised of Whitpain, Lower Gwynedd, Upper Gwynedd and North Wales so if you live in those areas, I may be asking for your support in getting signatures. The judicial positions are cross-filed: I need Democratic and GOP signatures and if you can help out, please message me and I will get you the forms you need. That applies to friends and family from both parties... if you live in the district, I need your help !!

Many of you know that this has been a very difficult decision for me. I never wanted to run against MDJ Murray as an incumbent and chose not to do so six years ago. When I first heard last winter that Judge Murray was going to seek re-election despite his inability to complete the term, I stepped back and said I would not run. However, based on many conversations with people that I trust and whose advice I take to heart, I will be seeking the endorsement of the GOP committee for this district later this month. Judge Murray cannot fill his term because he will be forced to retire next year. I don't make the rules, the legislature does. We lose many great judges to mandatory retirement. If it was simply a matter of me waiting until Judge Murray retired and seeking first the appointment and then the election to fill the remainder of the time, I would be happy to wait. I wanted to wait out of respect to Judge Murray and have told him that personally. Unfortunately, my hand is being forced by a a third person seeking the seat who is planning on running against Judge Murray whether I do so or not. I am not willing to look back in five years and say "I wish I had run in 2011."

When it comes down to it, my qualifications both personally and professionally are strong. I have lived in Whitpain Township for almost 40 years. I have raised (or am raising) five children here. My three older children are hard working good young people -- a clerical worker at the courthouse, an inner city middle school teacher and an American Airman, serving his country. My husband and I have done a good job balancing the demands of our careers with making sure our kids grow up to be responsible citizens. I have volunteered with schools and in the community and I have done so constantly -- not just since the Summer of 2007 when one of my opponents moved here. I have started Mock Trial teams at Wissahickon and at Gwynedd Mercy Academy as an attorney adviser. I have served as an executive officer for the Wissahickon Band Parents, the Cheerleading parents and the musical theater and drama groups for the high school. I currently volunteer both at Shady Grove Elementary where my 10 year old is in 4th grade and at Hobbit House pre-school where my youngest daughter attends pre-kindergarten. I have taught crafts to children, to adults as well as making items for charity. I am an active member of Woman's Club of Whitpain and have served as a committee person, Whitpain Township and Area 10 GOP secretary for many years. I have worked the polls in the rain, in the cold and while pregnant (my youngest daughter was almost born AT the polls on May 16, 2006). My husband is a Chemistry teacher at North Penn High School and he also serves on many committees and does work with children. Our scheduling skills alone qualify either of us for elected office. We didn't just move to the district and have me decide to be the Magisterial District Judge -- I have lived here and worked here and volunteered here my entire life. We are devoted to this community and have shown that devotion for decades.

Professionally, in addition to being a wife and mother, I went back to law school in 1992 when my older children were 7, 4 and 2 1/2. After school, I opened my own law firm where I work full-time to this day. I am an experienced lawyer who has devoted her practice to criminal defense and family law for the past fifteen years (17 if you count my two years as a certified legal intern before law school graduation). I chair the Rules of Criminal Court Committee for the Montgomery Bar Association -- a joint prosecution and defense committee. I am active in the Women in Law committee as well as in the Criminal Defense committee. Since last Spring, I have been a part-time Solicitor for the Montgomery County Office of Children & Youth where I assist in keeping the kids of Montgomery County safe once they have been adjudicated as dependent children by the Juvenile Court. I am also the attorney in charge of child support for that office; which means that if OCY places children, it's my job to try and get the parents to help pay the costs of that placement. I have served for 14 years as an arbitrator for Montgomery County -- sitting on three lawyer quasi-judicial panels to try and relieve the civil court docket by resolving smaller cases and district court appeals. My professional experience is such that I am the most qualified person to run for this seat: I can fill out the whole term AND I know the law and the rules. Magisterial District Judges are not required to be lawyers -- but it is a tremendous advantage that I have such a variety of litigation experience.

On a very personal note, to my friends who have helped me agonize over this decision and to my wonderful husband who has supported me in more ways than I can ever express, thank you. I may collect hundreds of signatures, go to the mini-endorsement convention that will be held late this month and not receive the endorsement of my party. If I do not receive that endorsement, I will not run. Period. I think any candidate who runs in a race like this without that endorsement should step out of the race and I have held other people to that standard for years; I expect all three candidates for the endorsement to show their respect for the committee's decision. I may get the endorsement and not win the primary. I may win the primary and not win the election in November. But to not try would be a travesty. I have, for many many years, wanted to run for this seat. It is a shame that I have to do so against one person I respect tremendously and that has been my dilemma. But I cannot sit back and let my dream be taken away by someone who has not been here for a fraction of the time that I have devoted to this district. All of the support that I have received and know that I will continue to receive is appreciated. It's appreciated a lot.

Thanks for reading.

A new day dawning.

2010-07-17T07:57:00.000-04:00

It's now July.... mid-July to be exact... and it's been three months since I posted anything. I realized that since I was up early and Jenny was still sleeping, I would try and catch up a little. So,,,,, here's what's new:

When we last left me, I was just adjusting to the fact that my knees were no longer in excruciating pain ALL the time and that, this lack of pain would let me work out, lose weight, have less knee pain and finally break the 29 year vicious cycle I have been coping with as best I can since October of 1981. When I saw people staring at how fat I was, and even now when they still do so, I wanted to scream at them: "Try walking on these knees... just for ONE day!!!" By the time I had the chicken cartlidge injected on March 18, 2010, I was on crutches almost every night just to get around my house, taking 3 advils every 4 hours or so and so tired of being in pain that I couldn't stand it. When I first went back on weight watchers in very late February/early March, I would try and walk more and it was simply NOT possible. Very few people knew how crushing the pain was -- what was the point in telling people (who don't really care anyway)?

And then I sprouted feathers and now have wings!!!!!!!! Two weeks after the injections, I started walking 2 miles a day; VERY slowly and tentatively. In mid-April, I added an elliptical workout, with no resistance and no incline -- I am still VERY careful. My initial rate on the elliptical was 2.5 mph, but I worked out 3-4 days a week, including starting to do ab crunches and some weight lifting on the machines. I slowly worked my way up and, as of Wednesday's workout, I am now doing 4.35 mph 3-4 times a week on the elliptical. I am also focusing very carefully on each section of my abs. My daily workout routine includes anywhere from 400 to 800 crunches, front, obliques and lower (BLECH!!!) and I now intersperse those ab workouts with free weights -- 3 pound weights at home, 5 at the YMCA gym. I also swim laps whenever I get the chance and play in the pool with Ryan, Jenny and children of friends of ours -- it's a FANTASTIC upper body workout to be throwing Jenny around like a "beach ball." Those are HER words, not mine.

And then there is karate class.... the love of my physical lifestyle!!!! I had signed Ryan up for karate after winter swimming ended because he wanted to do it and I didn't want him to be Slug Boy until summer swimming started. I would take him to class in his little gi, knit outside the classroom as he did the moves and learned and he really liked the class. One afternoon when I was working out at the gym (karate is through the Ambler YMCA), one of the instructors/black belts and I got to talking. He had seen me amping up my workout so I joined karate class too. WOW!!!!! What an incredible workout!! What an incredible hour/90 minutes, three times a week!!! What an amazing way to help me reach my fitness goals AND to clear my mind of the drama that surrounds me. After I finish a karate class, I feel better -- mind, body and spirit as the Ancient Greeks might have said. There have been days in recent weeks where I truly believe I would have cracked completely if I didn't have karate class to look forward too. Tuesday night was such a night -- but Wednesday was karate and, after clearing my mind and opening it to learning martial arts, I felt human again.

As an example, Thursday started at 6:15 a.m. and ended at 10 p.m. after a swim meet. This would be my last as Beachcomber's announcer, registration chair, gopher to get water, batteries, computers, printers, copying lineups.... all so that I can be belittled, demeaned and chastised by people who need to get their power kicks on the shoulders of others. I knew going into the meet that I was done volunteering for a few years because with Melissa's wedding next October, there is NO way I can make a commitment to summer swimming. I had actually made the decision NOT to be involved several weeks ago when one family had played games with registration -- it eventually got in on time, but the fact that no one "allowed" me to say to this particular game player "STOP!!!", added to the fact that the rules made up by one person (despite her claims to the contrary) apply only to MY child -- her child goes to the practice that is more convenient for her schedule. Summer swimming is supposed to be a fun way for kids to stay in shape until September; it is NOT supposed to be filled with drama and control freakiness. There was SO much I could have said to this woman 10 days ago: when we joined the team, there were (I think) 52 swimmers... now there are 112; when I have a written registration policy, no one follows it, but when this woman sets an arbitrary age for participation NOT supported by our league's rules nor voted on by the board or the parents, that "rule" is then used to hurt a 4 year old child's feelings; when I suggest that we have never HAD an actual parents' board election, I am removed from ALL emailings including those about coaches gifts. The list of her mean actions and nastiness and passive aggressive dishonesty could fill 10 of my very long blog posts.... or I could walk away, have Ryan and Jenny swim next year without participating.

Karate, when added to the Year of Chaos that was 2009, has helped me learn to walk away. I'm not saying that I am perfect. I am not saying that I couldn't have handled my disagreements with this woman better (because I DID finally tell her to go f*** herself after she got done SCREAMING in my face" "If I don't have my credibility, I have nothing." I guess she has nothing then because what her friends say about a meeting without minutes where she then turned that meeting into a rule book which she now points to as if it is the engraved Word of God.... must be nice to be the unelected Queen of the World, but I can let it go because that was my Life Lesson of the last 18 months. I'm sad for the dynamic that has Mark taking Ryan to Relay Champs today, Individual Champs next Saturday and the banquet which I am not attending, but in the greater scheme of my life, I am going to enjoy karate class and taking Jenny to swimming this week and next Saturday. I am going to enjoy having next Tuesday night to FINALLY go see Eclipse (since I missed seeing it with friends because of the summer swim schedule). I am very happy in my life and I refuse to allow mean-spirited and narcissistic smug people get under my skin... much. The karate pads DID take a pounding last Saturday.

And of course the big news... I was chosen in early May to be the new part--time solicitor for Children & Youth of Montgomery County. I still run my firm, but I also now have the chance to do that "something positive" that I was looking for professionally. I love my co-workers (who are some of the most dedicated people I have ever met). I love the camraderie of an office setting. I love what our offcie's mission is -- to protect kids!!! It has been a big adjustment to work 2-3 days at OCY and run the firm and deal with all this swimming garbage AND helping Melissa plan the wedding AND deal with the fact that my husband went on strike in April and therefore had to teach until June 30th (please GOD!!! Can there NEVER be another strike???). I feel good professionally... like what I do matters.

And then there is the physical improvement. Yesterday marked 17 months without a cigarette. I have now, unofficially, lost 40 pounds. I feel FANTASTIC and know it is only going to improve.as I work to be a more fit person... not a skinny person (although I wouldn't object to skinny), just someone who isn't a grossly obese smoker, waiting for a heart attack or for diabetes to set in. When I set out to make certain changes in my life in 2009, I had a plan... so far, so good. The picture of me, Mark and the 2 youngest kids was taken on July 2nd... I am down another 8 pounds since then. I am wearing some non plus-size clothing and am knitting myself a VERY expensive tank/shell to celebrate. NONE of my clothes fit and I absolutely LOVE going to clothes stores and buying COLOR... no more blacks and browns for me. I wear coral, purple, teals, greens and yellows. If people want to snicker behind my back now at the fat girl wearing clothes that aren't shaped like tents, let them laugh now.... come next October at Melissa's wedding, I will be the second most gorgeous woman in the room.

Last but most certainly not least... my kids are happy, healthy and thriving. Jenny can and did swim a full 25 yard lap of the pool without touching the wall. Ryan has been getting extra swimming lessons with one of his coaches and is now beating me in swim races (which may need to be MY new motivation!!!). Mark Jr. LOVES Italy and the Air Force... I can't wait until he comes home on leave in November! hip's substitute/temporary teaching job became permanent and he will be returning to teach 7th grade Social Studies for a 2nd year. Melissa and Mike are at his sister's wedding today, but we've booked the reception venue and plans are moving forward.

Short version (Bless you if you've gotten this far)....LIFE IS GOOD and anyone who tries to change that will be unsuccessful... I am no longer all about pleasing everyone. It's my turn.

Trying something new

2010-04-11T19:52:00.000-04:00

My sister has, for about a year, been earning money from home by writing blog posts. I'm not going to take things that far, but when Blogger added the Amazon link, I decided to try this out. What's amusing is that I tried to add a link to Jessica Seinfeld's Deceptively Delicious recently and was unable to do so. Changing our diets by hiding food has been an incredible experience -- the kids know we're hiding veggies because Mark is so NOT subtle about it. They are eating healthy, I am shopping in produce aisles and am looking forward to fresher produce as Spring and Summer approach.

Kids are doing great! Melissa and Mike are making wedding plans. Chip loves teaching, loves his freedom, loves his new car. Mark Jr. went to Venice this weekend, also bought a car, was named Innovator of the Month for his squadron in February (he just told me today) and continues to love the Air Force as he approaches his 1st year anniversary on April 13th. Ryan is taking karate in the off-season from swimming, still playing cello and loving the freedom to run around with his friends. Jenny and her friends are inseparable -- playdates turned into family dinners both Friday and Saturday night this weekend; we are thankful that these three wonderful little girls have brought us new friends and a new social life. Jenny continues to love school, swimming and ballet.

I finally joined Socks for Soldiers, Inc. and am in the process of knitting my first official pair of regulation socks. This is a wonderful organization that just celebrated its fourth year. The knitting is structured, but worthwhile. I am also finishing a sweater for a friend of mine's baby and then will be making another one for another friend who is due in May. Meanwhile, I've finished two of the three "Best Friend" sweaters for Jenny and Kayla and have the yarn for Katie's. I can't explain enough how MUCH these little girls love each other! Also on the needles are a pair of plain gray vanilla-patterned socks for Mark and a pair of green Eagles socks for me in a mock cable. I recently made three hats for Ryan and his two best friends as well as the girls' sweaters.

The Eagles traded Donovan McNabb. I would have been turning cartwheels down the street on my new, chicken-cartiledge-injected knees IF they had gotten something good in the trade and IF Michael Vick was going to be the new QB... draft picks and Kevin Kolb...? Nope. Not so much. Phillies look good (not that I'm watching... I promise... not until August or they lose).

Work...... BLECH!!!!!! I am busy and most of my clients are not making me TOO crazy, but the few who ARE making me crazy are doing so in spades.

Politics....?????? Read the post from a month or so again. It's the 10 Amendment, Stupid. It's not "whose spending more money on what pet project." If it isn't authorized by the Constitution, the federal government needs to get the heck out of it!!!! That includes health care, marriage, crimes, prayer in schools and anything else not specified

Healthier all the time

2010-03-12T17:50:00.002-05:00

Not sure if I am correctly adding the link to this incredible book will work... this is a short post. After I had been one year without a cigarette (plus a week or so; needed to catch up on some lunch dates), the time had come to get serious about the weight thing too. I have struggled with my weight since having kids and having a couple MORE kids at 37 and 42 was definitely tough on the weight control. Add quitting smoking. Add bad knees limiting my ability to exercise at ALL. Add a sedentary profession. Add just plain me being just plain ornery because I wanted to keep SOMETHING bad in my lifestyle.... well those "additions" have added up. My goal is simple -- quitting smoking was step one, making myself more mentally healthy was step two and losing weight HAD to be the final step.

But the time has come for Step Three. I went back on Weight Watchers 2 weeks ago and have been losing steadily and at a healthy rate. I'm making healthier food choices for me and the family and Mark and I are committed to doing so as much as we can within the confines of the craziness that IS our life. Enter Jessica Seinfeld's "Deceptively Delicious." Because Mark and I have such crappy eating habits, our kids do too. Jenny is fine -- she's watched me TRY and eat healthier over the last year and is very good about fruits and veggies. Ryan...? Not so much and it's not a problem for him. Now. Ryan swims a lot. He takes karate now. He runs around with his friends. But his eating habits are atrocious and that's our fault. No problem now... in fact, he could probably stand to gain a little weight... but I don't want to set up an issue for him later in life.

All else is good. Work is too overwhelming to think about on a Friday night with 2 briefs due in the next few days. I like where I am, where I am going and how I am starting to feel.

Ohhh... and I learned to knit right-handed (that's a story for a WHOLE different posting) and the sweater that Jenny is wearing in the picture above has left-handed back and front but right-handed sleeves. The picture is from yesterday at her Star of the Week pizza party at school -- please note that I am eating a salad!!

We the People of the United States of America...

2010-01-26T11:11:00.003-05:00

ok... here it is. I have been mentally cooking how to phrase this blog post for well over a year but I have finally, on the eve of the President's 1st State of the Union Address, had enough. I have had enough of spin, of rhetoric, of talking heads who twist each and every piece of data and poll result into an object lesson for their side. Let's start off from my own political perspective because the labels no longer fit the majority of the voters and to just slap a label on me is to underestimate where my vote may or may not go on Election Day.

I am a small-"c" conservative and a member of the Republican Party. Since 1982, when I first registered to vote, I have voted in almost every primary and every general election except one (1984 -- it was a geographic thing). For a time in the 1990s, I was a registered Democrat and switched back to the GOP because the Dems simply did not understand what the People were saying to them. The Republicans seemed to understand the concept of smaller federal government in favor of local control of most issues. Or they used to understand that concept better than the Democrats. Now, neither side of the debate, on a national level, gets it. Every problem that we face as a country could be better solved if the national politicians not only "got it", but acted on that indefinable "it" in a manner that is consistent with the Constitution of these United States.

I am personally pro-Life. I believe that Life begins at conception and ends when God decides that person's time is done. I do not believe that anyone else gets to make that decision for another person though -- up to a certain and reasonable point. My belief in the point in time at which Life begins is just that -- my BELIEF. I have no scientific ability to back it up. I am not God nor am I His messenger on Earth. People should get to make that decision on their own belief structure up until that decision takes a viable life. My own solution would be to allow abortion up until the end of the first trimester so long as counseling on other options is actively provided AND so long as the person is over the age of 18. I believe in parental consent laws. I do NOT believe abortion should be legal after 12 weeks or so unless the mother's physical health/life is in documented grave danger. That is MY belief; agreement isn't necessary. I am not running for President or Senator or any other national office that seems to have taken over yet another local issue for the federal government.

I am also, therefore, anti death penalty. Save your arguments about why the death penalty is ok -- it's the law of many states and the wish of the majority. I disagree with the majority on that issue because I do not believe the government has the right to take a life. What if the government gets it wrong? Even if they get it wrong ONE time, it becomes state-sponsored murder. I am not ok with that. I am a huge fan of real life sentences without the slightest chance of parole. Throw a convicted murdered/child molester/terrorist into the deepest, darkest, dampest hole you can find. Do not give that person internet access or unlimited appeals. But taking their life is just plain wrong. And again, criminal law should be a state-based issue. Federal government can deal with criminality in the military or from terror attacks (and in military tribunals for God's sake!). Let the states deal with issues locally wherever possible.

Is anyone sensing a theme yet? Without going into an endless lecture about the limitations placed on the federal government by our Founding Fathers, let's just say it simply: Jefferson and Madison et al. got it correctly. Small federal government is best and should have LIMITED powers to deal with the bigger picture issues. It is simple. If I have a problem with cars driving too fast near my son's bus stop, I will make that problem known to my local Board of Supervisors in my township. I will NOT ask my two senators to pass a federal law that ties highway funding to the number of tickets written by all jurisdictions in America with no money set aside to track such tickets and with no controls on how long the program lasts. The abuse of the federal powers is rampant in this country and neither side gets it.

Now I am a little spoiled. I live in a Republican township, in a Republican school district and a Republican county where the elected officials pride themselves on keeping our taxes as low as they see possible (they don't always succeed, but they DO try). I can and do use our public schools for my kids. Because I am involved with my community, I know who to turn to if there is a problem. Not everyone is so lucky. The gluttony of the federal government over the past two decades is now so out of control that if you put a stop to one piece of spending, it becomes an unraveling of the entire federal government and therefore the state governments that have become addicted to the federal funds that they should never have received in the first place.

So step back and imagine what the federal government SHOULD look like under the Constitution with its current amendments. National defense? Absolutely... mandated by the Constitution. Postal service and currency...? Yep. Articles of Confederation didn't work so well when we were first starting out because 13 colonies with their own monetary systems wasn't so great. Immigration...? Yep... it relates to the borders. Interstate commerce...? Yep.... but not everything IS interstate commerce that is claimed as such; that's the second biggest power grab in American history. Maintenance of federal highways...? Of course, but not as a political blackmail tool to get the states to comply with unrelated federal legislation. Banking regulation.....yep. Within reason and only because currency and the value of the dollar relate to the value of the federal dollar. That being permissible, there is an extremely fine line between regulation and dictating to private companies. The banks insured by the FDIC (a federal agency) should be required to be responsible in their overall practices and report problems in a timely manner -- they should NOT be charged fees which WILL be passed on to their customers and which will further tighten lending and therefore consumer spending. Common sense.... what a concept.

Everything else... let me repeat that EVERYTHING else is in the purview of the state or local governments under the 10th Amendment. Without the 10th Amendment, 4 or 5 of the 13 colonies would not have ratified the Constitution. Period. The Founding Fathers did not believe that a large federal government was a good idea. We fought a war over this in the 1860s. I know that the South lost and that history is written by the victors, but even the Union troops are rolling in their graves at HOW big the federal government has now become. Some areas where the federal government should not ever, ever be...? Education, Health care (except as it relates to crossing state borders which should be regulared as the banks should be; a Glass/Steagal Act for the insurance companies), Welfare, Unemployment, and all of the "social issues" for which there is a tremendous variance across the country.

Auto company bailouts....? I don't think so. Not ever!!!!!!! I don't see the federal government lending my small business a large chunk of money that allows me to pay myself a huge bonus. Like all small business owners, I am struggling right now. If my struggling clients don't have money, I don't get paid. I am still providing legal services, but these people can't pay what they don't have. Federal Government having summit after summit -- on race, on the middle class, on climate change -- NO, NO, NO!!!!! I want the transparency the President promised when he ran for office. How much did President Obama's trip to MA to stump for Martha Coakley cost the taxpayers????? That is political action. How much did the trip to go get the Olympics to Chicago cost???????? Add up all of these junkets and travels and photo opportunities and you are talking REAL money. All the pork in the so-called Stimulus Package (also inappropriate)...? I want to see every penny posted on the internet like we were promised. Oh wait.... President Obama is great at speaking. Not so much with the governing.

The GOP is equally at fault. Not only did former President George W. Bush never meet a spending bill he didn't sign, but the GOP (nationally) is so damn worried about social issues in which the federal government has NO business that they are just as guilty of the spending. Stop running to the Far Right, guys.... I am looking for fiscal conservatives who give more than lip service to the size of federal government. I don't care if, in running for federal office, you share my beliefs and values. Those running for federal office need to learn the lesson of NJ, VA and MA. That lesson is NOT that the GOP candidate should win or will win... that is simply a decent by-product of the lesson because it limits what the Far Left can do to us.

Both parties are SO far away from what Joe and Jane Smith want or need from their representatives. Maybe THEY should stop listening to Rush Limbaugh and Keith Olberman tell them we want. Maybe they should listen to what We the People are telling them... because we are shouting it over and over again.

We didn't start the fire...

2009-12-31T20:58:00.004-05:00

it was always burning since the World's been turning.

Free association is the only way that I can reflect on 2009 in any sort of meaningful way and Billy Joel's epic words have never been more true than in this crazy, maddening, overwhelming, ever-changing, upsetting and joyful end to a difficult decade. So here goes...

Recruiter's visit, documents, MEPS and DEP. June date, never mind, April is a finer time. Party for our family, that date is not good for me. Easter Sunday, all together... BMT the next day. BMI, 319, is he coming home again? Heat in San Antonio, riding on an airplane. Mississippi, never mind, we'll go to Mobile this time. Rental car in Alabama, a new one in Biloxi now. A week in heat, humidity, shrimp boating and a Confederate cemetery. Plane ride, back again, Mark's phone flushed down the airplane potty. When is Jr. coming home? Driving through a 2 foot storm. Safe at last, home again, broke his ribs while hugging him. Next stop Italy... got your passport, family?

We didn't start the fire. It was always burning since the World's been turning...

New President, federal spending, auto bailouts, stimuli. Do we have a 10th Amendment? Never mind, it's inconvenient. Cash for Clunkers, Health Care plans, unemployment double digits. More troops to Afghanistan but without a working plan. Underwear bombers on Christmas Day; Obama looks the other way. What's politically expedient? He'll find it every time for sure. Senators who switch their party, bribes to others for their votes. Politics in 2009??? Give me Clinton back again!

We didn't start the fire. It was always burning since the World's been turning...

Blake's death, Eagles losing, rain and rain and Phillies losing. Many people, fewer friends, endings o'er and o'er again. Wait, it's Fall, Eagles back. I still believe and don't look back. Knitting 'til my fingers bleed, making cards and writing briefs. Changes, changes everywhere... and without a cigarette!!!!

We didn't start the fire. It was always burning since the World's been turning...

Knitting friends who sent me yarn, Black Friday shopping, Wicked tickets, Eagles/Dallas for the title, for the bye and for home field. And...

Most of all, there is HOPE. Not the false, politically nuanced crap that is perpetually spewed by our elected representatives. But I have a true feeling that the new decade will bring change and chaos but with a renewed positive outlook. Not only is Mark Jr. about to have the adventure of a lifetime by being stationed in Italy. Not only are all five of my children thriving in their schools, activities, jobs and careers. Not only am I starting the New Year and decade with my incredible husband, my sons and Jr's friend (and Wii bowling).

But Melissa and Mike got engaged on Christmas Day -- and I knew for a week because Mike properly asked Mark for her hand. We spent this afternoon craft shopping and wedding planning for a wedding that is tentatively scheduled for October 1, 2011, our anniversary and my Daddy's birthday. My family has been together for the holidays and we are truly blessed by that -- most military families do not have that luxury and we are beyond grateful that the schedule was finally in our favor!

For all of you who lifted me up, held my hand, dried my tears in 2009... may this new decade bring you peace, prosperity and joy.

Lazy while crazy

2009-10-17T20:25:00.002-04:00

It was simply too cold and damp and my knees were in agony after Jenny's ballet class today. I really NEED to use my Saturdays efficiently since it's Fall and the Eagles are playing AND the Phillies too. That being said, I have been going like the Energizer Bunny on steroids for months and months and months. Work, the kids' activities, going to San Antonio and Biloxi and New Orleans (funny... I got there before Obama did as President!), wondering WHERE my son will be heading next (and losing sleep over the obvious answer to that question), politics and occasionally knitting in between. Even the knitting is pressure-oriented at this time of year between Christmas presents and the Woman's Club craft auction. Melissa and I spent two nights this week making Christmas cards to be sold at the auction and I'm doing a baby blanket too (and carrying Chip's girlfriend's socks as a portable project -- NOT posting a picture because she doesn't get to see them UNTIL Christmas; she picked the yarn out though). When I realized yesterday that I was putting February trial dates into my blackberry and it was SO raw out today, I jumped off the hamster wheel upon which I spend my life. Sort of.

One of my ongoing projects has been scanning old pictures so as to preserve them. I haven't had 30 seconds to sit and scan since the Air Force consumed my existence in March when they moved Jr's reporting date, but here and there I scan a few pictures. Today, I scanned more than a few. I went through the remainder of pictures my mother had asked me to scan, got ALL of the kids' school and activity and prom pictures scanned and scanned some of the pictures from when the older three kids were small -- the blackmail potential is tremendous!!!!! Then I took the three hours and burned pictures onto a disk -- that process seems like it shouldn't take as long as it does. It probably would have been faster if I had just burned ALL of the scanned pictures, but I knew my mother only wanted certain ones and there are a LOT of scanned pictures. So that was my cold and rainy Saturday afternoon (and evening -- I just finished!). My knees hurt more now than they did this morning because scanning sounds like a passive project, but isn't. I have to get up and down and walk around my table and put the now-scanned pictures into safer storage than they have been over the years. One of the interesting things that I learned when I started scrapbooking and card making (which is absolutely Melissa's and my FAVORITE new thing to do because the product is simply FUN) is that pictures degrade over time because of a chemical called "lignan." I'm probably spelling that incorrectly, but it's what fades and browns pictures. So as I scan the old family pictures (some of which are from WAY before I was born like my Daddy in Korea), I am re-storing all of them in such a way so as to preserve them as well as possible.

What else is new...? Phillies vs. Dodgers in the NLCS. Everything old is new again has become my mantra. It's not just from last year, but from the late 1970s. Dodgers would beat the Phillies in the NLCS and then we would cheer for the Yankees (who Daddy cheered for anyway) to beat the Dodgers. Phillies vs. Dodgers..... did I expect a repeated World Series visit to be easy???? Nope... I am FAR too realistic a Philadelphia sports fan. Last year's October 29th miracle is still fresh in my mind and spirit -- and will always be one of the most fun days of my life. The Eagles are working their usual stress on me -- I think that's why stress at work, with the kids, with all of the "stuff" I do on a daily basis isn't so big a deal. I'm an Eagles fan... always... and that brings a certain level of perpetual angst to one's life; especially in October. Especially when the Phillies are post-season as well. What we have NOT done this year is to add to the Eagles stress by inviting everyone and their cousin over on Sundays. We want to watch the games and spend quality family time -- Eagles time is about ALL the time we can make to be together. And we've taught Jenny to cheer and yell for our Beloved Birds. At three, she needed to get used to being in this house on Fall Sundays.

The kids... Jenny started preschool at Gwynedd Mercy's Hobbit House. The program is outstanding, the teachers and staff are the most incredible people on the planet and I love that she is there. SHE loves that she is there. She also doesn't show her Jenny-ness at Hobbit House. Her teacher was saying to me earlier this week how Jenny cooperates, how Jenny blesses herself and prays before she eats, how Jenny shares with the other children. On and on about how sweet and cooperative a child she is -- I almost asked "is there another Jennifer in the class?" We got into the car. Jenny waited until I got in and started yelling at me about something and telling me "my daddy says..." which is her newest thing: if she gets an answer she doesn't like, she will inform the adult giving her the non-pleasing answer that "her Daddy/Mommy/Chippy/Ryan says" the opposite of the non-pleasing answer. My youngest daughter is QUITE a handful at home. At school, at swimming lessons, at ballet class, at restaurants, at craft stores... she's the perfect child. No one believes me and Mark and Chip when we tell them she's sassy! She is taking non-recital ballet class and swimming lessons and enjoying both activities thoroughly.

Ryan is enjoying third grade (most of the time -- he IS eight after all). He also started playing the cello which I expected to make my house sound like someone was strangling a cat for at least a few weeks. Nope... he is playing beautifully and really enjoys it. He doesn't enjoy carrying the cello to and from school on Mondays for lessons and Fridays for orchestra practice, but he loves playing. Naturally, he is back into winter swimming so he's out two nights per week (with Mark -- Jenny and I are solo which is usually when I find some mindless knitting project so as to NOT listen to her watching Caillou on demand!). The moment the rain stopped today, he and his friends were outside, running around and having a good time. Eight is a challenge for parents, but it's a happy time for kids, I think.

Jr. is still in Mississippi where he says it is still hot as blazes. He told us a few weeks ago that he was being stationed in Italy once he finishes his training but this week said that he may be going to Northern England instead (both of which are his dream bases and either place would make a LOVELY vacation destination next Spring/Summer for me). From wherever he goes next, he is deployable but I really, REALLY try not to think about that overly much. I think I would lose what little sleep I still manage to get if I thought about deployments too much. He loves the Air Force and is doing well. We are very proud of him and his service to our country.

Chip was able to get a limited time, permanent building substitute position which ends the middle of November. After that, I guess he'll go back to daily subbing. However, he also got a job as the lead singer in a cover band that performs up and down the Northeast corridor. He's been in Virginia all weekend and was in New Jersey last weekend. It's pretty awesome for him to be able to use his talents since he has yet to find a full time teaching job. On that note, my husband is still working without a contract on last year's salary and without the HUGE bump he should have gotten for finishing his Master's plus 30. He'll get the retroactive pay eventually, but things are tight since we budgeted for the raise AND for my clients to pay me regularly. Thank God we don't have extravagant tastes -- we would be in big trouble if we did.

Melissa is working for the county and has also picked up a 2nd job so as to save for a car and for a wedding. Nope... no date yet (did you hear screaming from PA...? Then there's no date), but planning is starting. She and Mike have decided not to do a destination wedding so finances are in play there too. She's doing wonderfully in all aspects of her life and Mark and I are really proud of the young woman she has become -- it's funny too because all of the other criminal lawyers are always telling me how awesome she is. "Is there another Melissa working at the Clerk of Courts???" Just kidding, sweetie.

Finally, there is politics... I have been pondering how best to address my feelings about the national stuff and am just not there yet. So here's the local.... there are SEVEN opening for judges in my county due to retirements, deaths and 2 new judges. We currently have ONE woman judge on our bench (and she's a brilliant woman and a nice lady). I'm not sure I need to say more than THERE IS ONE WOMAN JUDGE IN MY COUNTY!!!! However, gender alone is not enough for me so for those of you in Montgomery County who are reading this, I will ask you to ask yourself a few questions before voting for judges for the Montgomery County Court of Common Pleas: (1) Has the attorney been an actively practicing lawyer IN MONTGOMERY COUNTY for the past five years? Not a recent member of the Montco. bar association because they practice law in Philly and live in Montco. If the candidate has not been an active Montgomery County lawyer for AT LEAST five years, please do not vote for them. They will not know our rules and procedures. They are carpetbaggers and things are run more smoothly and differently here than in Philly. OUR system works because the lawyers know it. If a judge does NOT know it, it's going to be like a monkey wrench in the gearshift. (2) Has the candidate been practicing law for at least 14 years? If not, they are junior to me and I would prefer -- this time around; we have 5 more spots in 2 years -- they not be chosen as a judge. (3) Does the candidate have something to offer OTHER than gender, race, ethnicity? Has she or he been active in our community? Has she or he volunteered to chair bar association committees? Has she or he practiced in a broad range of cases OR has she or he practiced in one area for such a long period of time that the candidate could take the criminal, civil, family or probate bench IMMEDIATELY and have the knowledge to sit in judgment of issues.

I am openly supporting two candidates although I know exactly who I am voting for each of the seven spots. Patricia Coonahan and Carolyn Tornetta Carluccio meet each and every one of my requirements as a citizen, a voter and a lawyer. Both women are dear friends of mine and I have served on bar association committees and taught CLE classes and know them to be honorable, smart and fair. Pat, the chief of the DA's Appellate Division, is one of my constant adversaries and she has never treated me with anything but respect and fairness. She is probably the smartest woman I know and would make an incredible judge. Carolyn has lived her whole life in Montgomery County. She was the first woman Chief Public Defender. She's been a prosecutor, a defense lawyer a civil lawyer and now does land usage work. Her son and mine were in musical theater together a hundred years ago and she is a great mom and a better lawyer. She also single-handedly brought the Women in Law committee back from the dead back when NO ONE was part of it. Think carefully about who you vote for, but PLEASE give Pat and Carolyn your votes!

And now it's 9:20 and I'm going to have dinner and watch mindless TV with my husband. For the record, I am now eight months smoke-free (as of yesterday) and have lost 11 pounds on weight watchers (which I went back on last month). I have a LOT to go with the weight, but I feel wonderful now that I can breathe again. I can't WALK most days because of knee pain, but I can breathe.

And the Phillies and in the NLC and the Eagles play every Sunday and my children are happy and healthy and well. My life is good and no one can take that away from me no matter how hard some people have tried to do so over the years. As I read back on the 2009 posts and really recognize the journey that has occurred, I realize that 2009 has become 200-mine after all. I don't CARE what others think because I know that I am a good mom, a decent lawyer and i feel very content with where I am as this year creeps to a close.

Thanks for reading!

I believe I can fly... 2009 opening day edition

2009-09-13T17:29:00.004-04:00

It never changes... every year on opening day of the Eagles season, I just KNOW that this will be THE YEAR. I guess when you've been a real Eagles fan for four decades, there isn't a lot of choice BUT to believe or you shouldn't call yourself a fan. Last January, when the impossible almost happened and then the year went downhill (fast!), I let myself believe that there would be a parade on Broad Street sometime around my 45th birthday. But then the Arizona Cardinals wanted it JUST a little bit more (and God Bless them because they were SO disrespected; as an Eagles fan, I get that). In the off-season, the Eagles didn't re-sign my much-loved Brian Dawkins. They signed Michael Vick (REALLY?!?!?!?!). Defensive Coordinator Jim Johnson first retired and then died.

Then my friend's son died. Then the Air Force decided that my schedule was something to be toyed with; just on principle. Then I took the surgical scalpel was taken to my life (with VERY positive results... I am SO much happier as a rule without the non-entities pretending to care when it's convenient to them). Then there were the trips to the HEAT of Texas and Mississippi and the returns to the non-stop rain. There were professional triumphs and then the self-questioning about whether anything I do professionally mattered (it does, but THAT was a struggle since late June). There was the "is my husband's teachers' union going on strike?!?!?!?!" stress, the "getting Ryan back to school and he wants to play the cello" stress, the lack of a permanent teaching job for my "always does the right thing" son and the schedule snafu on Thursday (September 10th) that almost, but not quite, had me crying in public.

But there are SO many blessings. Ryan is showing interest in music and is excited to play the cello (which is unGODLY expensive by the way!!!). Jenny started school on September 11th and, instead of letting the Empty Nest feeling take control of me, I organized my yarn and crafting supplies. Her school is SO wonderful and proved it again on Thursday night when I was sad -- those people are AMAZING although saying a temporary good bye to her babysitter (and my surrogate mother) on Thursday afternoon was agonizing. Sue loves us unconditionally; it's such a nice thing to have someone like that in your life! Chip is subbing in a couple of districts AND got the Assistant Drama Director job at our local middle school. Mark Jr. WILL be home for Christmas after graduating his tech school in Mississippi on December 18th (and may be home on and off for several weeks). And there may be a dual celebration when he is home -- biting my tongue on that one for now.

And then, today, after eight of the most grueling months (in a row) that I can remember. After quitting smoking despite all of the stress. After GETTING the younger kids and my husband back to school. After feeling as if I was choking for SO long... 1 p.m. EST rolled around. There was food. There were cosmos (and LOTS of beer for my husband... he's a little tipsy LOL). There was my family -- including a call from Jr. in Mississippi for his 20th birthday (WHERE the HELL did that lifetime go?!?!?). There was the Fox Sports football prognosticators saying (Coach Johnson): "I think the Eagles are going to win it all but not today."

And then my Beloved Birds ROARED into the Panther's Bank of America Stadium in Charlotte, NC (where I involuntarily spent some extra time last month). In a year that has brought SO much change and confusion and questioning about whether doing the RIGHT thing was the right thing to do... I still believe in my Eagles. How can I NOT believe in my Eagles?! Broken ribs...? Either McNabb can play or Vick can take over in Week Three (Kevin Kolb...? Not so much! Can we have AJ Feeley back please?!). We liked what we saw -- our Birds literally forced the Panthers to forfeit the game in the 3rd quarter!! I absolutely LOVE that the four teams that matter -- Eagles, Cowboys, Skins and Giants -- are looking so good. And that goal line stand to end the Panthers...? PRICELESS!!!!!

Eagles 38
Panthers 10

Any questions how good I feel for the first time in forever????????

And if I thought it was hot in Texas...?

2009-08-24T16:25:00.003-04:00

My Lost Month post mentions, several times, how grossly hot it was during the long weekend Chip and I spent in San Antonio for Mark Jr's BMT graduation. It has been over 100 degrees in PA many times, but the solution for me has always been a combination of air conditioning and swimming pools. My electric bills have REALLY increased over the past 1-3 years too; I don't mind being in my 40s but I DO mind that my internal thermostat has stopped working. I am hot ALL the time. As in, I rarely wear a coat in the snow. As in, hats? What do you mean heat escapes from your head? That's AWESOME... can it happen to me? I want Jr. to get stationed in Alaska -- I'll go THERE in August rather than...

Biloxi, Mississippi. In mid-August. Really????????? If, and it is a BIG if, my body temperature re-regulates itself after the last week or so, I will be stunned. You know how people say "it isn't the heat, it's the humidity"? Those people are NOT lying to you -- believe them!!! The one consolation is that it was almost as hot in PA while we were gone; less humid (which DOES make a difference), but it was apparently pretty gross here too. That being said, we had a wonderful trip and nice long visits with Mark Jr. -- a tremendous improvement over the nightmarish, time-limited trip that was San Antonio. What was so incredible was being able to sit outside while the kids played in the hotel pool, Mark smoked (and I didn't -- SIX MONTHS!) and just talk with my son without feeling as if his MTI was going to pop out from behind a tree (oh wait... there WAS no shade in San Antonio) and prevent me from seeing him. Despite the choking humidity and heat index well over 100 degrees every day, we had a wonderful trip. There are some (now, looking back) funny parts:

(1) The trip down... we were scheduled originally to drive down to Mississippi, taking several days to do so. At some point, my wonderful husband decided that he didn't want to do that. I guess in hindsight (and wearing really thick glasses), it was the right decision. So we flew. With an 8 year old and a 3 year old. With NO direct flights to Biloxi (because who REALLY wants to go to Biloxi??) from Philadelphia. Our flight left the terminal in Philly on schedule with a transfer scheduled in Charleston, NC to a smaller plane to take us to Biloxi. There was almost exactly an hour between flights -- it was NOT enough time. It wouldn't have BEEN enough time even if our plane had taken off from Philly on time. I said the plane left the terminal on time -- we then waited well over an hour on the runway at Philly. Oh yeah... this vacation is starting off REAL well... we're going to miss a connecting flight to Biloxi where no one wants to really be. We get to Charleston, NC in good time (pilot had a lead foot)... and if US Airways had let those of us with connecting flights off of the plane AND we had run really fast with the 2 kids AND we had a clue where in Charlotte/Douglas Airport the new gate was... We all know those things did not happen. We missed our connection and since no one really wants to go to Biloxi, there wasn't another flight until the next morning.

US Airways instead offered to fly us to Mobile, Alabama. We had no rental car in Mobile, Alabama; the rental car was in Biloxi, Mississippi. Oh goody! A three hour layover in a strange airport (with no smoking area for my husband) and we're not going to have any way of getting from Alabama to Mississippi (about an hour drive because people drive FAST down South) because Orbitz is refusing to help us make new arrangements for our travel and Avis in Mobile isn't going to honor our Avis in Biloxi reservations. Meanwhile, we're in Charlotte, NC... we couldn't have driven down to Mississippi instead of flying with 2 small kids with a connecting flight to a city that no one wants to go to?????????? I could have knit in the car!

Without going into excruciating details, if you are EVER considering booking a trip with Orbitz, you need to NOT do so. I have never encountered worse customer service (and am still experiencing it almost 2 weeks later by the way).

After eventually deciding that this was now an ADVENTURE (it was no longer a fun family vacation and we were only a few hours into the trip), we took the flight to Mobile, Alabama. We rented a car one-way to Biloxi (and that was an all-day drama on Thursday which was solved by the AMAZING customer service provided by Avis at Biloxi/Gulfport "International" Airport). We drove to the base and picked Jr. up to spend less than an hour with him before he had to be back (the plan had been to spend several hours with him on Wednesday but missed connections screwed THAT plan to the wall). So now we are in Biloxi, Mississippi -- more on that in a minute.

(2) Mark flushed his cell phone down the airplane's toilet on the way home. Need I say more?

(3) There was a very gay man, painted all in silver, who accosted Mark and Mark Jr. (the guy ignored me, Ryan and Jenny) at Cafe du Monde in New Orleans. He had balloons for breasts and he posed for a picture while extending his tongue down to one of the balloons. There is a picture on facebook -- this is a family blog!!!!!!

Those are the three things that were either funny at the time or are, in hindsight, quite amusing to me. Who would want to go to Biloxi? Let me recommend it to ALL of you (not in August -- it was gross) as a potential winter vacation spot! Biloxi was hit harder than New Orleans by Hurricaine Katrina in 2005; New Orleans got flooded, but that's because it's below sea level. In the 4 years since Katrina, it is obvious that the people of Mississippi's Gulf Coast have not only pulled themselves up by their bootstraps, but have gone overboard on their recovery efforts. Other than the heat, I was extremely impressed by Biloxi and by the American Spirit of the Mississippi residents. If you ask them about what Katrina did (and most of them do NOT bring it up in conversation), they will point out things that they still haven't fixed and there are signs of what the big storm did to the region. However, they do not make their existence about "We are VICTIMS of Katrina." We visited Jefferson Davis's house, Beauvoir, which was demolished by Katrina -- and were able to tour the completely re-modeled main house and the Confederate cemetery behind it. The guide almost made Katrina into a positive because the ripping down of the walls that happened allowed those who maintain Beauvoir to see what color the walls REALLY were supposed to be.

New Orleans has not recovered... I wonder how much if that lack of recovery is someone else's fault and how much is the lack of sheer willpower to come back better than ever. In New Orleans, it was difficult to find any store that didn't have a display of Katrina-related merchandise. It was almost as if those in Mississippi were saying "OK you big bitch of a storm... we'll re-build" while the people of New Orleans were saying "Feel sorry for us because we got hit by a hurricane." It's very difficult to describe the differences in attitudes between the two states, but it is very obvious when one visits both. I could, and probably will at some point, wax political about the differences; not in the mood today. I keep meaning to write a blog post about my political philosophy in general -- because neither party represents me in the slightest anymore -- but that will need to be a post in and of itself.

No clients got arrested for a custody dispute while I was gone (almost, but not quite). There were no REAL emergencies that arose while I took my first ever, non-maternity consecutive 2 week vacation. To catch up on the post from early July, my client who had his conviction overturned is out of prison (that took another several days after the blog post) and is working. I have been constantly reminded, including once during my vacation and again today, that if a person chooses to do the right thing, they will be smacked down each and every time for it. The nice thing is that, because I emotionally eliminated the people who didn't support me from my life four months ago, the people who remain DO support me. I had a horrible afternoon today at work -- really uncalled for nastiness during a court hearing for which I was subpoenaed mid-morning on my first day back in the office after 2 weeks! A friend was absolutely there for me after the crappy experience. Actually a couple of friends were there, but one in particular reminded me that it is in my nature to do the right thing whether I want to or not... hearing from my friend that he is "proud of me" because I did the right thing in a complex legal situation was exactly what I needed to hear. He talked me down off the "I do not want to practice law anymore" fence again! There ARE nice lawyers out there; just too few and far between.

So school re-starts for Ryan next week for sure and, God willing for Mark too (there's a contract dispute that is worrying me non-stop). Jenny starts preschool on September 11th and I have warned the principal that she is nowhere NEAR as co-operative as Ryan was, Jenny definitely has a mind of her own; that is a very polite way of describing my daughter's "sassy" personality. Jr. is still in training in Biloxi. Who knows... if he stays down there long enough, maybe I'll fly down in the WINTER to visit him. Alaska... really. According to Sarah Palin, you can see Russia from there... that's close enough to Afghanistan for my tastes as a parent! I'm rooting for Alaska. Chip is still looking for a full-time teaching job; the market is ghastly and it stinks that a young adult who has followed the"rules" and graduated with honors despite having a very small extended family to emotionally support him can't find a job. I feel badly for Chip that his persistence and hard work hasn't yet paid off. Fingers crossed BIG time for him to find a permanent teaching job.

Besides... he gets a full-time job and I get a craft room. Thanks for reading my mental rambles.. pictures will be added later.

P.S. I added pictures above. Interestingly enough, the devastation picture was from Mississippi and the family picture was from New Orleans. I thought it was important to show what the Gulf Coast still looks like.

The Lost Month -- a/k/a June 2009

2009-07-08T11:05:00.005-04:00

Wow!!! What state am I in? What time zone? Does that thermometer REALLY say 107 ????? WHAT day do you want to put that on my calendar??? I put time into the court nine weeks ago!!! I'm melting!!!!!!!!!!!!

That was June. Two and a half days in Harrisburg. Five days in San Antonio, Texas. Five days in the Poconos. Unfathomable heat. Pouring rain and hail. If I wasn't withering from the sun, I was drowning in the incessant rain (gonna build me a boat... Jenny wants sheep on it). Court dates. Briefs due. Swim meets. My blackberry almost rebelled completely. The people who matter all knew and understood that June was going to be a nightmare -- those who didn't know June was going to be a nightmare...? Well, you can read the last two posts to understand how little I care about those who aren't on the card list. Add two more people (or subtract 2 people if one is being specific since they are OFF the list) with no further comments. I'm over that part of 2009 and it is ALL good.

The funniest thing about last month was that it really was NOT that different from Junes before it. I go to Harrisburg every year for this one excellent seminar. One if the kids or the other have been swimming for years now so that schedule is the same. But then there was San Antonio... and Mark's BMT graduation. Hotter than the fires of Hell doesn't even begin to describe the temperature. It was 103 when Chip and I landed. Yes... I got onto a plane WITH my knitting needles... twice! Of course, by the last day of the trip in that CRAZY heat, I would have offered to fly the damn plane just to get home! I have never felt heat like that in my life and if I HAVE felt heat like that, I wasn't 45 and having hot flashes when it gets above 70 degrees.

I guess I am now supposed to do the typical Proud Air Force Parent post about how wonderful BMT graduation was -- and parts of it WERE wonderful -- but after a lot of thought, I am NOT going to blow sunshine at anyone reading this. That was one of the most HORRID weekends of my life. It was ghastly hot. There was virtually no shade. The base was going through an inspection (that happens every 3 years) so we had to stand in line for "Base Access Passes" in addition to the passes we already had -- outside, in the heat and no shade for close to two hours. Those passes were not checked a SINGLE time while we were there despite dire warnings at the parents' briefing about how if you didn't have an access pass you would be "on the ground with an M16 to your head." REALLY???? In 103 degree heat, Chip and I waited in that line. At least the passes could have been checked ONE time. Mark Jr's TI also decided that limiting base liberty and town passes (even for Honor Grads) was a great idea -- his squadron had a different schedule than every other graduate and we spent the vast majority of Thursday afternoon standing in line for ice cream and then had to RUSH back Friday because his liberty had been shortened and then his squadron had an hour less than others on Saturday too. It was CRAP... and have I mentioned the HEAT?????

I've missed Jr. -- I firmly believe that time limitations shouldn't be permitted during graduation weekend unless there has been a SERIOUS (not some b.s. power kick) infraction of the rules. It was not a good initiation into military life for the families of the new Airmen. And as badly as I feel for myself and Chip with the limitation, the fact that this TI also told honor graduates that, instead of the Sunday town liberty they had earned AS honor grads, they could only have base liberty...? That is just plain wrong. The six men in Jr's squadron who made honor grad earned that extra town pass. Frankly, the time problem when added to the sickening heat ruined the trip for me. As proud as I am of Mark Jr. (and I think I forgot to say that), I was unimpressed with the experience.

But on the high notes... I saw Shamu!!!!! On Saturday, we went to Sea World, rode a couple roller coasters, walked around a little bit and saw Shamu!!! When Sea World first opened 100 years ago when I was a little girl, I wanted to see the killer whale. I never got to SEE the big killer whale. I saw Shamu!!!! Actually, I should say I saw "ShamuS" because there were 4 whales in the tank at one point -- SO cool !!!! Also cool was that Sea World lets military and up to three family members in for free AND recognizes the service men and women and their families before the Shamu show. Sea World was AMAZING!!!!!

Also amazing was the Alamo. When Jr. had to go back from town pass early on Friday, Chip and I were definitely feeling down so I randomly said "let's go into San Antonio and see the Alamo" which we had both wanted to see. Almost everyone who has been there has said how disappointing the Alamo was -- not to a couple of history geeks!!! What an incredible experience the Alamo was! And then we took a boat down on the Riverwalk (which made the temperature drop about 20 degrees) and it was lovely. We went back on Saturday with Jr. and did the boat again -- it was a very interesting experience in architecture and history and culture. The Riverwalk is worth seeing -- sometime between October and April so as to avoid the HEAT. I am in the process of putting pictures up in my facebook albums of the trip. Chip took a lot of those pictures and really showed a talent for photography.

And then there were the Texas highways. Holy Mary, Mother of GOD!!!!! I'll state it very simply for those of you from the Philly area: I would rather drive on the Schukyll Expressway every day in rush hour traffic for the next ten years, twice a day, in a VW beetle than to EVER need to drive on a Texas road again. Any questions??????

I am proud of Mark Jr. and what he has accomplished. He is doing great -- thriving in the Air Force and talking possible career. My heart quite literally almost broke in two when I saw him in his dress blues, accepting his Airman's Coin, marching down the Bomb Run at graduation, looking VERY dapper in his uniform and straightening it if it was even a fraction out of place! I took the requisite "underwear drawer" pictures and pictures of his bed. Say what you like about the Armed Forces (and you BETTER not say it around me or the other moms), they teach a kid to be tidy!!!!!!!! I'm debating a new method of child-rearing with Ryan and Jennifer: SCREAM at them for eight weeks straight and give them less than 5 minutes to eat a meal and make them run in 100 degree heat... apparently, it teaches them to make their beds!

The Poconos the next weekend were wonderful as always. I had gotten Mark (Sr.) the trip for his 40th birthday (which ended up being the day Chip and I left for Texas so our long weekend getaway was postponed a week). By the time we got up to the mountains and into the pool in our room (Caesars.... yes, the one with the champagne glass hot tubs. No, we don't stay in the champagne glass room), I was nearer to collapse than I have ever been. I thought April had been difficult???? June, which was almost over, had eaten me to pieces. We got there, we ate breakfast, we drank a little (uh huh... that's my story and I'm sticking to it; five drinks is NOT a little) and then we vegged. We played a little bingo, ate delicious meals, but mostly we read, knit and watched "West Wing." I have accepted that I am middle-aged when I go to a couples resort and knit a sock while my husband re-reads Harry Potter. It was the best five days I have had in forever. I came back and felt human -- right as the 1st half of 2009 ended (we came home on June 30th). Coming back in a hailstorm with only 20 minutes to get Ryan to a swim meet wasn't great, but it WAS still the first half of 2009 so it was expected to have SOMETHING irritating.

I was planning on the rest of 2009 to be a LITTLE more low-key. I was really, really hoping that 2009, Part II would provide a noticeable improvement over Part I. I should really know better. The second half is already proving to be just as ridiculous as the 1st half of the year was; maybe I'm just numb that I am not getting AS upset as I would have in June. I won a big criminal case on appeal -- I actually won it on June 26th, but didn't know until July 1st -- YAY ME!!!! Or not. My client, against whom all charges have been dismissed and who has been discharged from state prison because I won on appeal, is still sitting in a maximum security state prison as I write this post. I am NOT going to say much more about what I "feel" about this turn of events... at least not right now... except to say this: I won. You lost. Once in a VERY great while, a criminal defense lawyer wins a case... let my client out and stop playing games. I would have enjoyed the win (which really does NOT happen very often in what I do) SO much more if my guy was out of prison right now. Not to mention that my client is blaming me. My client's family is blaming me. I am utterly powerless at this moment in time so it is a completely hollow victory that once again destroys my faith that the criminal justice system works for everyone.

Again, I remember that although I go to sleep with the Constitution as my pillow every night (an old Dennis Miller rant against defense lawyers) when I represent people I know to be guilty, I continue doing so because the system NEEDS people who are willing to fight for the rules and the procedure that are there to protect ALL of us. Pollyanna much? Maybe, but it's what I believe in and it's why I do what I do. Guilt or innocence HAS TO BE irrelevent to me -- my job is to hold the Commonwealth's feet to the fire; to make them follow the rules against unreasonable searches and seizures or Speedy Trial; to make them prove their case beyond a reasonable doubt; to argue for clients who have received an illegal sentence. I believe in our Constitution... most of the time. Not today. Because no one says to an assistant district attorney: you lost. It's time to stop now. No one has the ability to FORCE them to stop. Instead, it's more of a feeling of "what a shame Bonnie won." No one says that... it's just a feeling. I am made to feel badly for doing my job which is necessary to the orderly management of our justice system. I have to be ABLE to win or our system fails -- I am going to lose 99% of my criminal cases in some manner (I can and do call a good plea offer a "win") and that is completely acceptable to me because Society is protected and so are our rights. But every five years or so, I am going to win a case outright. This case is quickly turning into a wholly unecessary drama because the "1%" happened.

I knew from the moment I made my customary timeline in this case (because I truly am a geek) that I SHOULD win at some point. That's not arrogance, it's the case law on Speedy Trial. This was a crystal clear-cut case of a guy not being brought to trial within a year (no boring the readers with excludable time and excusable delay explanations... it's not really a year). Sadder still is that I didn't expect to win the case at the level that I won it -- I thought it would require more appeals because I would lose at this level even though the law is really clear. But the judge did the right thing (this judge does that which means 99% of the time I lose and I try not to take that personally) because he is a good and honorable man. To win the case and to have my client against whom there are, right now, no charges, sitting in a state prison is wrong. At some point, I need to be into practicing law for the money rather than for my belief in the system... this case may just tip me over that edge. I never wanted to be THAT lawyer and it's a shame that the latter part of my career may become one without belief.

But other than my "win that isn't a win", the 2nd half of 2009 is better than the 1st half. Chip is still job hunting. Ryan is still swimming (until July 25th... then we get the six week break Yippee!!!). Jenny is turning into another Keagy Fish (a very special species) -- over the past week she has decided to swim underwater. On purpose... she LOVES looking at things underwater so she submerges herself. It is absolutely terrifying as a parent to watch a child who is barely three hang out underwater for up to 10 seconds at a time. There's some video on facebook... going to get more on there later. Mark Jr. is in Biloxi, Mississippi at tech school (where apparently it makes San Antonio look cool) and we'll be going down to see him there in a few weeks.

And my knitting and crocheting have been prolific. Socks, almost done a blanket for a friend's 1st granddaughter, random projects that call to me and I am making the time for myself to listen to the calling. I am very close to choosing a sweater pattern to make for myself (down to about 3 patterns now and have the yarn for them). I knit and crochet where I used to smoke (and STILL smoke-free, almost 5 months, WITH Mark smoking thirty packs of cigs while we were in the Poconos... I just had no interest) and I like that change. However, I'm really randomly knitting; I find it very hard to focus on a specific project or choice of a pattern which is not my normal knitting "style." If I can find ONE day where somebody doesn't have a claim (or a leash) to me, I plan to spend a day scrapbooking. I'm sort of in an place right now where I go where God/Goddess/Spirit/the Universe move me when I am not working 50 hour weeks into 30 hours of time.

And it is ALL good because it is now the second half of 2009. And it is a sunny, dry day with a cool breeze. I'm going to the pool. Forward my calls.

Christmas Card Clarification

2009-06-09T09:34:00.004-04:00

Obviously, it's been over a month since my last post. After the first four months of 2009 being sucked dry by the US Air Force's recruiting process, a heavier-than-usual workload, quitting smoking, college graduations and the day-to-day drudgery of taking kids to school, sitters and then doing it all again at the end of the day.... I needed a break. I also needed to do the "vampire surgery" and to do my best to minimize those negative influences that my last post talks about. Before I go further, I think some clarification is needed...

Being off my Christmas card list doesn't mean that I am going to (initially) be mean or nasty to you if I am required to work with you, speak to you or you text me about what I thought of the new Star Trek movie. Superficial is what "off the Christmas card list" means. I don't hate the people who are not on the Christmas card list. For the most part, I just do not choose to share my thoughts with them or to be anything other than socially polite or to work with them toward common goals/tasks. I guess the best way I can describe it is that those people have become "non-entities" to me -- I don't wish them bad things, I don't wish them good things, I simply don't care. The way I have distinguished most such people on my facebook for example is to create a category called "acquaintances" and exempt those people from seeing the majority of my stuff (pictures, comments, status, etc.). They are, almost exclusively, people with whom I can have a drink at a cocktail party for a judicial campaign, make small talk with and move on with our respective lives. In most cases, there isn't even anger involved -- it's a disconnect, not a fight.

The people who have been taken off my Christmas card list are those who have repeatedly demonstrated that they are not true "friends" (or family) as I describe the word -- they either do not care about me and my family or pretend to do so or have done something that I find unacceptable to me personally -- their actions may not be unacceptable to others, but they are to me. I don't hate them, I just choose not to associate with them. It isn't a personal attack. The one exception where I decided that a person wasn't getting that I was uninterested in her comments about basement cleaning or about her life in general was easily handled -- facebook allows you to "de-friend" someone, emails/texts can be ignored and if there is a medical situation that I need to be aware of, that one person can call and I will, naturally, get back to her. Lack of interest in the mundane does not extend to lack of concern if there is a serious problem (for family anyway). However, that one person who was "de-friended" has still not ONE time gotten in touch with me or the older two kids to ask how her nephew is doing in basic training or how to write to him. She also failed to send a card to my oldest son for his honors college graduation. Yes, it WAS a test... she failed. Nope, no one in my family decided to bother with her birthday last week -- non-entities do not require extra effort and she has had far too many chances over 42 years to do the right thing.

The vast majority of people who are off the Christmas card list are simply people who have, in one way or another, demonstrated one too many times that my time is better spent elsewhere and with other people. Many years ago, before facebook, twitter, emails or the internet, people spoke to one another. People wrote letters to one another. People also understood that actions and words have consequences. I am too old and too set in my ways to change my beliefs that there are correct actions/words and incorrect actions/words. I am far from perfect myself -- I have made and will continue to make many mistakes. When I hurt someone's feelings (intentionally or unintentionally), I really do my best to say "I'm sorry" without any other qualifiers if I am truly sorry for my words or actions. My decision to eliminate the emotional vampires from my day-to-day life was and is based in a self-protection concept: I am not going to apologize for making myself healthier and removing these people (and a couple of the activities) because doing so HAS made me feel better in the past month. It is an ongoing process as I learned again yesterday with the action of a person who I thought to be a friend -- "acquaintance" is a better description. That's not a statement that I dislike the person since I actually like the person on a certain level; just not going to trust that person because the person obviously does not WANT that trust. No harm, no foul.

All that being clarified (lawyer talk for long-winded; too bad I don't bill by the hour for blogging)... Life is improving. We are VERY proud of Chip not only for his cum laude graduation, but for the way in which he jumped RIGHT into the teaching fray and has been subbing for the past few weeks. He really planned all of that out well -- got the documentation that he needed from his college, got all of the paperwork into our local school district, religiously checks the website for subs -- he's doing GREAT. God willing, he gets a full-time teaching job by doing the right thing as he has almost always done! It would restore some of my lost faith in humanity if Chip were to do the right thing, graduate in four years with honors and with no trouble (other than that witch he used to date), look for a job and find one. Good guys DO need to finish first once in awhile, right?

Ryan and Jenny are doing wonderfully. Ryan is finishing up 2nd grade and, other than HATING the physical act of writing, is doing great in school. I hope Jr. appreciates the effort it took to get Ryan to write two letters to his big brother! Ryan can't wait until Jr. gets internet access and he can send emails and talk on the webcam! Ryan does NOT like writing! Ryan is also excited because the pool is open on weekends and because swim team is starting back up. He's an average, exuberant 8 year old kid. Average is good when you are eight -- look at the little kids who became tv stars as children; drug addictions, suicides, trouble with the law. Kids need to be average until they are at LEAST ten or twelve -- I wish our society recognized that fact more. It's something that I am learning as a parent with "the babies" -- I can be and am proud of them -- disgustingly so -- but they need to be kids and have fun for a few years. I won't add to this LONG post by going into my opinions on education in America today; that will need to be a novel in and of itself. In every way possible, Ryan is where he needs to be (if he wasn't, we would take steps to get him help and not deny problems... that too is parenting). We are proud of him and we want him to have a fun summer playing at the pool and taking a LONG car trip to "ssippi" as Jenny calls Mississippi.

Jenny took a set of swimming lessons at the YMCA so we could feel at least marginally comfortable with her in the water at Beachcomber and also so she would be comfortable and not afraid of being in a pool without water wings. As an aside, I have NEVER understood what parent thinks that those things are ok. They are dangerous and pure parenting sloppiness in my opinion. If your kid can't swim, you need to be WITH them in the pool -- water wings are not going to save your child's life and kids think they are safe wearing them. Pure stupidity -- especially after numorous people have explained the dangers to you and you still allow your child to put those damn things on and give in TO your child when s/he refuses to go in the water without the dangerous water wings! Anyway... when Jenny is in the YMCA pool for lessons, she wears (as do all kids) a safety vest or bubbles unless one of us or her teacher is physically hands-on her. She usually wears the floats for part of a family swim and then swims with one of us holding her. She can also stand in the shallow end at Beachcomber and LOVES to play there and in the baby pool. She is starting full-time pre-school in September because the only other option was to put her into a 2 day a week full-day program. I hate being a working parent sometimes -- my schedule adjusts some because I am self-employed, but I don't have a grandparent to help out when my schedule gets tight and we want Jenny to go to THIS school for the next 2 years. So it was 2 days or 5 days and we chose five. Of course, I don't have a grandparent paying her pre-school tuition either -- so working full-time isn't an option.

And mercifully, Jenny is also potty-trained (and has been for several months... just never mentioned it). After five kids, I am THRILLED to be finished with diapers!!! She still wears a pull-up at night (in her Big Girl Princess Bed), but she's been waking up dry almost every morning so we'll probably eliminate that pull-up really soon. We had a BLAST for her birthday!!! Even I was overwhelmed by the amount of pink (and after the 22 years between the girls, that was QUITE a task). We called it the "Barbie Birthday" although there were components of princesses and My Little Pony too. She loves her dolls although I have to say that the one Barbie who sings the same 2 songs over and over may be losing her batteries soon! She also got the classic Barbie car with a Malibu Barbie inside (who usually drives Hillary Clinton Barbie around -- it's a HOWL!!!) and a ballerina dress-up and butterfly wings and a wand and a Barbie Princess movie. Kate... if you are reading this... you are a SERIOUS enabler and when you and that man you are marrying have kids, just remember that paybacks are a bitch!

As for Jr., if you are other than an "acquaintance" on my facebook, you can read what's going on with him. If you are NOT on my facebook (or have been removed from it because you don't get that your opinions are unwelcome when you haven't bothered to call or email since Jr's party) and are interested, feel free to email me. I refuse to put his status updates and his accomplishments up here because those who are off the Christmas card list just don't get to know those details. Those who are off the list are off, for the most part, for failure to show interest in what he (and our family) were going through during the earlier part of 2009 -- if you don't care enough about him to want to write to him or to ask one of us how he is doing, you don't get to vicariously follow his triumphs through this blog. That being said, many of the people on that "acquaintance" list would get information if they asked how he was doing (and several of them have). We'll just say there have been triumphs and I can't wait to see him!!!

And now, finally to the true nature of friendship... as is obvious from my recent posts, I have been exhausted, angry, nicotine-deprived (for almost 4 months; I don't feel at ALL deprived... I am so OVER smoking), overworked and generally feeling lousy for most of the 1st half of this year. I write tongue-in-cheek about the Christmas card list, but some of the people who were surgically-removed from my life were family and another was someone who was one of my closest friends for more than a decade. The removals were necessary for my mental health (and there is at least one person who needs to BE removed and I can't figure out how to do so without being cruel so they're still around). It is mentally unhealthy for me to be the one to host holiday dinners and Eagles parties only to have guests arrive and complain about how the food isn't gluten-free or to NOT complain but remind everyone in the room how the gluten-free lifestyle is best. Show me a letter from a doctor that says "Person X has been diagnosed as a celiac," (because there is a medical test for that condition) and then I'll care about your health kick du jour. Chiropractors and self-diagnoses don't count. It is mentally unhealthy for me to waste hours of my time standing at my local polls twice a year handing out green pieces of paper to people who have already decided how to vote -- if I take that same 30-40 hours and devote the time to a specific candidate for judge who I think will be AWESOME, that time is MUCH better spent and I feel better about what I am doing. It is mentally unhealthy for me to be around a group of people if ONE of the people in that group makes me want to punch her in the face (to quote Jr. before BMT). I miss the group, but I can't stand one of the people in it and do NOT want to be rude and tell her so. So sometimes, it's all about balance too.

And then there are the REAL friends... on May 15th, at about 9 a.m., my office doorbell rang. I wasn't expecting a client and it was WAY too early for mail or UPS. Standing there, loaded down with yarn gifts, was a friend who although she lives sort of locally, was primarily an online friend with shared interests. Friends from ALL over this country -- several of whom I had only spoken to online and a few on the phone when one of our group needed legal help -- had sent yarn to the local friend to give to me, along with knitting books, patterns that were adapted for my love of circular knitting and that I had wanted to make, but hadn't had time to convert, red, white and blue sock yarn to celebrate Jr's entry into the Air Force, handmade stitch markers and cards that had me sobbing. The love that was sent with those presents overwhelmed me completely. I guess when one's own mother doesn't call to ask how one is doing the day that one's child leaves for basic training (on the cell phone that was put on MY plan so she COULD call me and her three oldest grandchildren because her other daughter, whom she has financially supported for years, can't spare the minutes) -- I guess that makes me a little jaded these days. I won't even go into the grotesque display of inappropriate behavior I was subjected to this weekend because, as I explained above, such people are "non-entities" now and there is no sense in wasting energy on being disappointed.

BUT, having become so jaded and having to time and time and time again lessen my expectations of people, when people do something SO amazingly nice, they need to be recognized -- not as individuals (because this was a group effort and I love ALL of the women in the group for their support over these past horrible months), but as people brought together by a love of crafts and by a belief that a small group of people CAN change the world. Or at least my small portion of it. Their thoughtfulness at a time in my life when I was down, bruised and almost (but not quite) broken re-invigorated my outlook and reminded me that even though I can't count on people that any person SHOULD be able to count upon, I do have people out there that I CAN count on. At the time of the yarn gifting orgy, I thought it was me and my husband and our kids against the entire world. I was alone and I was scared and I was hurting -- it's why I had allowed the vampires to stay in my life long after I knew they needed to be gone.

So to my girls... ALL of you: THANK YOU AGAIN!!!!!!!! Every time I even touch those gifts, I feel better -- you all made a difference. And to my favorite "yarn mule"... lunch again SOON with or without the excuse of a yarn store close-out sale!!! At least after I get back from Texas and the Poconos; we're looking at July now!!!

Once again, the post is long. For those of you who stuck through to the end, look at it this way. I only post once a month or six weeks -- divide the length by 4 or 6 and it's reasonable.

The roller coaster ride

2009-04-29T17:45:00.006-04:00

There is no place to start except at the happy ending... no way to explain these last few weeks without starting from right now so I am quoting myself from an Air Force parent's group that I belong to:

And then there are the AWESOME recruiters!!!!!! Despite advice to do so, I had not called my son's recruiter and have spent ALL week waiting for the daily call in which my son tells me his weight is unimportant because of his BMI. NOT SO MUCH!!!!!! I am proud to report that, as of about an hour ago, my son is heading back to training!!!!! Another friend of his is in the enlistment process and called today to see how I was (SUCH nice kids). He was about to call their shared recruiter and I mentioned I had not done so all week because of what my son was telling me (which is that the TI said the recruiter had "screwed" up). I told my son's friend to make sure that he told the recruiter what had happened. A very few minutes later, my cell phone rang -- it was the recruiter who INSISTED that if my son was within weight, BMI wasn't an issue. I knew that, but my son kept telling us that he was being given different information and that he was going to be separated and that he was going to need to rebut the separation and that he was doing his best to work out on his own in medical. He was fully planning on fighting the separation because he wants to serve. This has been a HORRIBLE 5 days, folks. Anyway, my husband and I decided enough was enough and we BOTH got on the phone with Lackland's medical unit (because my son is a twit and put one of us each down on each authorization form so the WONDERFUL Sargent, and I mean that sincerely... he's going on my Christmas card list -- needed to determine which of us he could talk to -- welcome to my life). The Sargent pulled my son's file and was explaining weight requirements and BMI to me (which I knew by heart since Friday) when he paused and said "Oh... his weight is___ and I need to talk to my supervisor and then put eyes on [my son]." Apparently, the recruiter was also talking not only to Lackland, but to my son personally. The recruiter called us an hour ago, said my son was returning to training. That was all I heard before letting out a yell my son probably HEARD in Texas from PA. My husband took the phone because then I couldn't talk. The ONLY problem is that my son has missed 4 days of training and MAY be recycled instead of being returned to his flight (3 days is the limit). I am really hoping that the Air Force recognizes the mistake was on their end and let's him graduate on schedule, but am SO ok either way. I have not yet spoken to my son for an address call and his recruiter said we may NOT get one tonight (NO comment!). I'm thinking they are trying to decide where to put him at this point. Thank you all for your support... this Trainee's mom appreciates it a LOT!!!

So that's the end of the ride... the beginning was March 24th when my son's recruiter called and said that a specific job had opened up for which Jr. is qualified (as opposed to the general job for which he was currently scheduled to go to Basic Military Training on June 8th) but the catch was that Jr. would need to leave in 20 days (April 13th, Easter Monday). It is MUCH better to have a specific, contracted job when entering the Air Force so Jr. said ok. So much for MY plans of doing a joint Going Away/Chip's college Graduation/Jenny's 3rd birthday party! In 4 days, we pulled together a full-blown, GOD knows how many people were in my house PARTY for Jr. My oldest daughter and I had made lovely invitations for the party (that was not yet dated, but was going to be May 16th) -- there's a picture of the invitations Melissa and I made above. They were handed to guests on March 28th and I think the party went well given the SHORT notice (finishing school DOES pay off once in awhile!).

The time went FAST... Jr's stuff needed to be put into storage and then, 3 days before he left and on Good Friday, he went for his 72 hour call to his recruiter and his weight was borderline (I'm fat and I like everyone around me to be that way). He spent the ENTIRE weekend working out and drinking water until he STOPPED drinking water to avoid gaining weight. We dropped him off at his recruiter's office at about 3:30 on April 13th. Weight was still borderline -- they like them THIN in the Air Force -- but he weighed in fine at the enlistment center the next day and was on his way to Texas.

As a trainee's parent, you WAIT for that address call. I slept with my cell phone pillowed under my head -- NO idea if my kid was ok really (I knew he had gotten to San Antonio VERY early in the morning of April 15th after a bunch of weather-related flight delays). By that weekend though, I needed a massage desperately (despite my fatness, I am working out like a fiend myself and on weight watchers... SORE muscles). Don't you know, the SECOND I pulled out of my driveway that 1st Sunday morning, the kid calls and gives what I KNEW was a wrong address to his father! I finally figured out the address the NEXT Friday evening (April 24th). And then THE CALL came...

At about 8:45 p.m last Friday night, the home phone rang. The home phone DOES NOT ring often -- we all use our cells, but my cell was in my purse downstairs. The caller was Jr. who was telling us that he was being kicked out of the Air Force because his BMI was too high EVEN THOUGH he was within weight limits. He had been transfered out of his training squadron and into the medical unit. He told me all this in less than 2 minutes with someone SCREAMING at him to get off the phone. He said he would call me the next morning -- never called. Never called Sunday. We are completely insane with worry and confusion at this point. EVERYTHING, EVERY source, EVERY person we talked to said "if he's within his weight, it doesn't matter." That phrase was also contained in the Department of Defense memos I found online. NONE of this should be happening. All weekend long, we tried to contact Lackland -- phone rang and rang. Finally, on Monday, I got through to Lackland and then to the medical unit. A nice lady said "Does he have a girlfriend because he should have called" and then confirmed his BMI was going to get him separated from the Air Force. Junior then called a little bit later, told me he had NOT had a chance to call (because he had been on kitchen duty and then at church) and said he was being separated, but could fight it.

I have spoken to him BRIEFLY each day this week since Monday (i.e. 5-10 minute calls with BAD static on the line). In each call, we encouraged him to fight to stay in because he wouldn't be allowed to re-enlist for 6 months. He told us he wasn't allowed to work out (which the woman had told me too) and was trying to lose BMI on his own in what he called "the prison" because he couldn't train. The kid has, quite literally, been through Hell and back to serve his country. We should BE so lucky that there are more kids out there like my Mark Jr.

And my Chip. Today was a GOOD day all around when it became official that Chip will be graduating on Saturday from Kutztown University cum laude. He has also had a rough few weeks and the stuff with his brother has made those past two weeks even more difficult -- I'm afraid that Mark and I have been so worried about Jr. this week that we may not have told Chip how AMAZING we think he is and how proud we are that he has accomplished so much -- graduating with honors while working MANY hours during the Summer and even during the school year. Add his mascot duties and his volunteering to be a Big Brother to a local child.... Chip is also one of the good ones. Maybe we don't tell him that enough.

And then there is the "what have I learned" factor. I had sort of pre-written this part of this blog post weeks ago and have simply not posted it. I wanted to wait and see if I was proven wrong (and I WANTED to be proven wrong) about some of the people in my life. For several years, one of my best friends has been telling me (and she should take her OWN advice!) that I am surrounded by emotional vampires -- some friends, some family, some acquaintances -- and that these people are KILLING me because I cannot be the Go-To Girl to everyone. She has been telling me to take a scalpel to my life (my words, not hers) and to cut out the parts that aren't working. Not in a mean way (which is why the people aren't named here), but to walk away from those who take from me without EVER giving back, to step back from some of my volunteering (because it WILL get done by someone else) and to generally make an assessment of what is and is not important.

As with May of 1992, my son's enlistment was a watershed event in my life. If you are a family member and are reading this and you didn't text/email/call Mark Jr. OR me between the party and when he left -- or since to see if I'm ok since I have not been ok in weeks -- then you are NOT on my Christmas card list. If your response to us having to throw a party on 4 days notice was "next weekend is more convenient for me," -- you are NOT on my Christmas card list. If the fact that I have been forced to keep my cell phone on and charged and CANNOT take casual daily calls from outside Texas over the last few days for the most part -- you are NOT on my Christmas card list. If your good-bye to my son was to post on YOUR facebook page AFTER he left about how much you are going to miss him when you didn't bother to call HIM or text him or email him... well, enough said.

For the past four months, my life has been consumed with helping my son accomplish his goals. My true friends have been supportive even in the face of me slapping back at them because I am a mother watching her son have barrier after barrier thrown in his face -- including these past five days and including the death of his friend in February. Dates changing, not so great information, medical units and static filled telephone calls -- I like order in my life and these past few months have NOT been orderly.

For those of you who HAVE sent me text messages saying "just wanting to make sure you are ok" or who made me soup after I was a total WITCH to them yesterday or who have made sure that our family is hanging together.... we CANNOT thank you enough. For those of you who understood that this time has torn us apart and thrown us down to the ground and who have been there to catch us (and it is a LONG list of wonderful people)... Christmas (and Hanukkah) cards are on the way (in December). I thank God for you every night and I know that your prayers, energy and support have been important to Jr. in the past few weeks and knowing that you all "had his back" in the last week has HELPED. I hope you know who you are and don't hate me for the past month or so... I would deserve it from some of you.

And now... finally... I am going to try and sleep with the phone OFF. And MAN!!! Has my knitting been productive in the last month! Too bad little is FINISHED but I can take my knitting on the plane to Jr's BMT graduation in June (Michelle is on the "nice" list).

CRAP!! I really need to get ON a plane, don't I?!

Another month passes

2009-03-19T11:46:00.010-04:00

I haven't posted in forever. Obviously, things got more than a little out of control in February -- always a shortened and heightened month. Celebrated my 45th birthday on Feb. 5th which had, frankly, been giving me fits until I figured out the source of the angst. It wasn't that I was turning 45 that had me upset -- I hadn't had age crisis issues before so the fact that I was having one stunned me. My emotional worries were being caused by my oldest daughter turning 25 and realizing that her peers will be my professional colleagues when they graduate law school this year. I know, I know... it's weird. I'm over it -- now.

Then there was Blake's death a few days later. Blake was a friend of my middle son's and an amazing young man who lived with (note that I don't say "suffered") juvenile diabetes. On the morning of February 8th, Blake didn't wake up. My son (more about him later in this post) was supposed to "go chill" with Blake later that evening and had mentioned the lack of response to text messages which was very uncharacteristic. At some point in the early evening, my home phone rang -- NO ONE uses that number; anyone who knows us knows that (a) we rarely answer it; (b) that we don't like to use that phone and maintain it solely for a landline; and (c) if you want to get in touch with one of us, we all have cell phones... call the person you want to actually talk to since nobody gives messages to anyone else. Anyway, it was Blake's mother (a good friend of mine) on the phone. She said "I want to talk to you and then to your son." She gave me the news, got cut off by an incoming call and we ended the call.

After literally choking out the news to my husband, we decided that since we didn't know when Blake's mom would be calling back or IF she would be calling back (we knew we wouldn't be doing so under the circumstances), we needed to tell our 19 year old before he got the news through mutual friends, facebook, etc. When my friend finally called back, she was angry at me for telling my son the horrible news (I think she needed to be angry at someone and I was convenient). Regardless, she spoke with my son for a little bit and he then had some friends come over who helped him deal with his own grief -- my thanks to those two young men; my son did NOT want to talk to Blake's mom, me, my husband or his older siblings about what he was feeling.

The next few days were filled with making sure Blake's mom was ok. Another friend and I arranged for our knitting group members to be notified. We scheduled who was going to bring what food and when. We made sure funeral arrangements and facebook sites to celebrate Blake's life were noticed to everyone we knew in order to help out Blake's mom. Meanwhile, I was making damn sure that my son was ok (which he resented -- don't care), trying not to let this whole thing ruin my #4's birthday, getting ready to go away on a long weekend that had been planned for eight months and generally feeling like my brain was going to explode. It's only in looking back now -- a month later -- that I even remember any of the details of that week. I went to court on February 9th, apparently looking like I had been hit by a tractor trailer because a good friend of mine was worried sick about me (I guess I should mention here that I attended court a couple days after my dad's death five years ago and no one knew anything was wrong; this young man's death damn near tipped me over the edge). Blake's funeral was scheduled for Feb. 14th -- hubby and I decided not to cancel our vacation plans; there were going to be hundreds of people to give support to his mom and stepdad and we also arranged for emotional support for our three oldest children if that was needed.

When we returned from our long weekend, I quit smoking (last one was Feb. 16th at about 10:30 p.m.). Talk about "looks like I picked the wrong month to quit sniffing glue!!!!!!" (that's an movie reference in case anyone doesn't know... I do NOT sniff glue). Two days later, I came down with my second case of strep throat in a month and it was a DOOZY. Two days after that (I was ON antibiotics after all), I had a major hearing in a post-conviction relief act case that I think I should eventually win (I won't win because defense lawyers never do, but I "should" win). The week after that, #3 went to Ft. Dix for his 2 days of enlistment testing (I know... it's coming... hold on). The week after that, my babysitter was out of town for two days. Hamster on a wheel much?????????

So.... my number 3 kid's story. My 19 year old son is brilliant; like sickly so and doesn't study. Makes his dad and I nutsy crazy. After his sophmore year in high school, we basically said "get the grades up because you CAN or forget us killing ourselves for college tuition, especially anything other than community college." I'm a mean mom and am proud of that fact. Presto Chango.... grades went through the ceiling ('cause the kid is sickly brilliant and just needed to LOOK at his homework to get to almost straight A's). There was some discussion of enlistment during high school, but I was pretty opposed since we had 2 active war zones and he was not going to be 18 when he graduated high school. I hung up on recruiters daily after he took his SATs -- politely of course. He went to Millersville University in the Fall of 2007 and did ok the first semester but not so great in the 2nd -- here we go again, we thought, underutilization of tremendous brain power. When he returned to school in Fall of 2008, he paid for it himself and we made it crystal clear that the grades needed to come WAY up because we were not going to support an adult who didn't apply himself. The grades didn't come up. When he came home for Christmas break in December, we had a long talk and he decided not to get himself in more debt and to not return to college.

During the 1st week of January, he and his dad went to meet with an Air Force recruiter (a REALLY nice guy; I've obviously met him since). The military was an option. Community college was an option. Getting a job was an option. He chose the military -- six years in the United States Air Force to be exact. Yes... I am extremely proud of him for his choice to enlist. Yes... I am thrilled that he will be able to complete his degree AND have his student loans re-paid (I'd like even more if the money his dad and I laid out was re-paid). Yes... I understand that the Air Force is not in the thick of battle. I get it all. I am also a mom and my son has made a committment to spend six years of his life potentially in harm's way. We found out yesterday that he will report for basic training on June 8th but will be leaving here on June 7th.

So as I said at the beginning of this epic novel, it has been a shortened and heightened month. As of today, I am 31 days without a cigarette (thanks to Michelle, Anya and Maria in particular on THAT achievement!). As of today, I have been back on weight watchers for 9 days and lost 6.5 pounds in my first week. Yesterday, for the first time since the knee injury last Summer, I walked 1.5 miles in the sunshine at the park (in clogs... not bright... have HUGE blisters on my feet) and it felt wonderful. My time hasn't been my own (that is such an understatement as to just be silly), but I have managed to do some knitting, some scrapbooking, have a few cups of coffee with friends and take what was an INCREDIBLE long weekend away with my wonderful husband (with another one planned in mid-June for his birthday) with no kids.

The pictures at the top are of one of the invitations that my oldest daughter and I have made for my son's enlistment party (which we THINK is going to be on the baby's 3rd birthday on May 16th) and also of the baby learning to knit... not really, but she DOES love her yarn!!!! Maybe my next post will be a vent about the Eagles off-season "decisions" or have pictures of my 2-0-0-MINE knitting projects that are done....

What have I learned in the last month? I think my priorities may be changing significantly. I think I may want to be off of the hamster's wheel and may be ready to make some pretty big decisions/adjustments to my life so as to enjoy my life more. I know I have less patience with games and people who play them as each day passes. Lent is supposed to be a period of reflection and I am using it as such whenever I get a few minutes of peace and quiet. I'm making changes in my own life that I think are positive -- it's all about the baby steps -- and I think that's what 2-0-0-mine may end up being about for me.

Just plain angry

2009-02-08T20:02:00.003-05:00

If I start to cry, I won't stop. If I scream out loud at the top of my lungs, I'll scare the babies and it won't help. Everything is topsy-turvy, upside down and just plain WRONG! What had been a relatively quiet weekend and a fun day with Ryan for his birthday (since we won't be home) has simply gone bad.

A little while ago, a very close friend of mine called to tell me that her 19 year old son (maybe he's 20... he's also a friend of my 19 year old) had died in his sleep last night. What the HELL is wrong with this world that a sweet kid, who always had a smile on his face and LONG arms ready to hug me is just gone?????????? This amazing kid who was at my house watching football a few weeks ago and consoling me when the Eagles lost by saying "there's always next year." What the HELL is wrong with this world when there is now no next year for Blake????????

I watch every day as criminals get lighter sentences because they take a guilty plea -- I negotiate those freakin' pleas. I watch every day as family law clients fight over minutiae so that they can feel as if they "won" in a divorce settlement -- I help them do it. I see people cheat the legal system, commit welfare fraud, cheat their clients and waste money on things they can't afford.

Then there are the good kids. The ones whose parents are middle-class and struglling in a terrible economy. Who are paying large portions of their education, even at a state-related university like Temple, it's expensive. Who work as lifeguards all summer long and always have a smile for annoying 7 year olds like Ryan. The ridiculously tall young adults who manage their diabetes without making a fuss about it. The kids who have never been handed Life on a silver platter but don't bitch about it.

Those, apparently, are the people that God wants with him sooner than they should ever be taken from us.

I'll miss you, Blake.... so much.

The saga ends

2009-01-18T21:38:00.003-05:00

This will be a short post since I am very tired and very sad right now. Same thing... year after year after year. I was so desperately hoping that there would be a Lombardi Trophy in Philly before I turn 45. That can't happen now, of course.

On a cold January night, the impossible season ended for my Beloved Eagles in the desert of Arizona. They were outplayed, outcoached and the Cardinals wanted it more -- can't imagine HOW but certainly understand how Cardinal fans would be insulted by the lack of respect they received from the national media this week. The game was in Donovan McNabb's grasp -- I guess I shouldn't be surprised by the outcome, but I am as equally devastated by the loss as I was in seasons where the Eagles were 13 and 3 in the regular season.

That being said, we had a wonderful and LARGE party here today -- lots of people, a grotesque amount of food and alcohol, lots of yelling and as good a time as was possible with the end of a season that had become a metaphor for the first half of my life in some ways. Then again, 1980 ended with a loss too so I guess I've come out pretty much even.

Arizona 32
Eagles 25

Bring on the 2009 season!

Ain't no stoppin us now!!!!!!!!

2009-01-11T17:33:00.004-05:00

And on another cold January afternoon, with snow and ice leftover from yesterday's non-serious snowstorm event, the dream goes on and on and on...

Originally, we were even going to have a friend who is a Giants fan here but he was sick so his wife came without him. What was originally a party of ten became 17 -- including my sister, her husband, their 2 kids and their daughter's friend. Our friends' son is friends with our son -- so he and a friend came over too. Next week... same time, same station and (God willing) same outcome. My Beloved Birds are again playing for the NFC Championship!!!!!!!!

The Giants... the defending Super Bowl Champs, the #1 seeded NFC team.... yeah, they're home for the winter and my Beloved Birds are heading to where it's warm to play another NFC East team (ok... I'm almost 45, the Cardinals used to BE an NFC East team) for a chance for the ultimate and yet unrealized prize. All I want for my birthday (four days after the Super Bowl) is to see that Lombardi Trophy moving down Broad Street (and I also want knitpicks needles set and matching Super Bowl Championship paraphernalia like blankets and shirts and banners).

Thank GOD next Monday is a holiday!!!!! I am hoarse from screaming, exhausted from stress and don't want to have to worry about going to work on Jan. 19th (Thank you, Dr. King). The same friends and family will be here -- after we provide the food and the alcohol, they all know where everything is in my house -- the FREAKIN' NFC Championship game!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fifth time in eight years. First time EVER an NFC 6th seed team has gotten to that game.

Eagles 23 Giants 11 -- any questions how good MY mood is tonight???????????????

LET'S GO EAGLES!!!!! BRING ON THE CARDINALS!!!!!!

Don't Stop Believin'

2009-01-07T15:21:00.003-05:00

Hmmmmm... old Journey songs from 1981. New Year, same theme. I may 28 years older, but ... the picture above was done in 2004; mere weeks before the Eagles won the NFC. Few but me believed that after losing three straight NFC championship games, the Eagles would EVER make the Super Bowl. I did. I still do.

My Eagles didn't disappoint me. Even I, in my "Always Bleeding Green" mindset, got a little bit nervous during the Vikings game. Worse yet, I had woken up with a full-blown migraine at 3 a.m. on Sunday morning and had to lay in a dark room right up until game time. The "throw a long pass" call on a third down and one brought most of the migraine back too!!!! But my Beloved Birds prevailed (and it WAS only a moment or two when my belief wavered). Bring on those New York football Giants; the World Champions; the Almighty Eli; the blah, blah, blah. Wait a sec... or bring on the team that lost to the Eagles a few weeks ago; the team that has lost its most powerful offensive weapon; the team that we play twice a year and have a pretty good win/loss record with over the past five years (we can ignore last year entirely please). I am ALL about another Miracle at the Meadowlands -- Brian Westbrook... get those running shoes ready!!

Other than the Eagles, the New Year has been dreary (it really DOES feel like 1981!). Work is busy as all get out, but the economy is taking its toll; clients are trying to pay what they can, but everyone is hurting -- I'm fair about it to a point unless the clients decide not to pay balances at all. I am positively swamped for the next several weeks with briefs and pre-trial statements due, on standby trial in an interesting criminal case, a complex property distribution case at the end of the month and with appellate files that are so big I can barely lift them.

Weather has been gross for weeks -- rain, sleet, ice, cold then warm. BLECH!!!!!! We woke up today to no power and a FREEZING cold house at 5 a.m. (power had been of since about 2). Hubby had a 2 hour delay, but #4 did not so I got a late start getting the baby to her sitter's house and then getting home. Got some work done, but not a whole lot -- certainly not what I needed to get done today (which has been the story of this past week -- everytime I sit down to work on something, something else interrupts me!).

I've gone from having 2 of the 5 kids at home full time to having 4 of the 5 at home..... things are flat out CRAZY....

But I still believe !!!!!!

YA GOTTA BELIEVE, PART II

2008-12-28T20:02:00.005-05:00

And on a warm December night... when no one but a true Eagles fan thought it was possible. So much had to happen: the Bucs had to lose to Oakland; AND either the Vikings or Da Bears had to lose. We decided to throw one of our Eagles parties. After all, it WAS the Cowboys coming to town. After all, unless three miracles happened, my beloved Birds couldn't make the playoffs. But as I have been saying for so many months.... IT IS 1980 all over again and the Cowboys were in the way of Destiny!!!!!!!

We watched the Raiders beat the Bucs -- and let's face it, since 1981, no Eagles fan is ever going to be screaming "Go Raiders!!"... until today. During the early game, we kept seeing the Houston score -- omiGOD!!! they were beating the Bears. And then the Cowboys and the Eagles roared into the Linc. Only one team roared back out. For many years, I have watched the hated Cowboys and their arrogant players make their claim of being "America's Team." For oh-so-many years, I have watched the EAGLES be the NFC's best team or one of the best teams while the 'Boys fail to win a playoff game for a decade. I hear national commentators poo-poo our city and our fans and our spirit. Every year, for my whole life, Cowboys this and Cowboys that.

As we watched and screamed and jumped up and down and drank WAY too much and ate and made complete idiots of ourselves (and we feel a little badly since some of our guests weren't football fans; they WERE warned in advance)... once again as in October with the Phillies winning the World Series, I was that 16 year old girl again. The girl with good knees (I think my knees may be in pretty serious pain right now -- there was that one fumble run back for a touchdown where I jumped up and down and knew subconciously that I shouldn't BE jumping up and down; LOTS of drinking). The happy girl who had her whole Life stretched out before her on a silver platter. The girl whose Daddy would have LOVED today's game so much.

As my sister and I were texting back and forth: "It was always going to be the Cowboys."

Final score: Eagles 44 Cowboys 6

BRING ON THE VIKINGS -- IT'S 1980!!!!!!!

GO EAGLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Merry Christmas

2008-12-25T20:14:00.006-05:00

So we had a fun day (and Christmas Eve too although there was a LOT of alcohol involved which made this morning a little rough!). All the kids were here as was my mom. Everyine got spoiled rotten -- I do 99.9% of the shopping; I'm not sure whether my yarn addiction or shopping-for-my-kids addiction is worse.

As to LJB's comment below: Sorry Sissy, just didn't have enough room on the last post LOL

Pictures above are of my sister, pretend brother and I on Thanksgiving and of the kids and my mom today.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a GOOD NIGHT

Christmas craziness

2008-12-20T07:53:00.005-05:00

I looked today and saw that I haven't posted ANYTHING for a month (again!). I got the never-ending sinus infection and bronchitis that lasted for a month (probably because I was too stubborn to go back to the doctor when I didn't get better). I had root canal. I had difficult clients being more difficult than usual (and a few really nice clients who made it all worthwhile). Older kids coming home from school, holiday parties, swim season and feeling stressed 24/7. Even my shopping trip last week with my daughter became stressful -- not through anyone's fault, but traffic and lack of proper planning and weather that just feels dreary for the past few weeks has had me in a non-stop bad mood.

I actually did the bulk of my shopping in one day BEFORE Thanksgiving. Back before Kid #3 came along, I was a done-and-wrapped-before-Thanksgiving kinda girl. Now, not so much since 5 kids, a law firm and political abd social obligations keeps me a bit busy. I even thought, two days before Thanksgiving, that I was DONE except for stocking stuffers. Of course, that didn't work out and I still have ONE more gift to buy before Christmas. That's one of today's projects along with the continuation of the cookie baking orgy (made about 500-600 yesterday).

Knitting has been surprisingly productive. I am done socks for my babysitter and mother, mostly done a pair for my daughter, mittens for my two youngest kids and my niece, hats for my two youngest kids. I have decided that, once I do a couple of baby sets for new mothers or about-to-be new mothers, 2009 is going to be my year of knitting for me and me only. I think it's time I get a little selfish; not to say hubby won't get socks during the year because he really likes handknit socks, but I am really going to try taking true time for myself -- I finally got a cricut machine for scrapbooking and haven't even taken it out of its box because I make zero time for me.

Finally, I am having a rough time emotionally and have been for several weeks as I approach the 5 year anniversary of my dad's death -- Christmas Eve 2003. Since that kick in the face, Christmas has become more of a chore for me than a source of any pleasure. I am also having a HUGE emotional trauma over the birthday coming up in February. I guess because my 40th was so overwhelmed with my dad's death six weeks earlier, I never LET myself have an age crisis. Son now, as I move inexorably toward 45, I am really feeling it!!!! It's silly, I know it's silly and I'll get over it but SHEESH!!!!!

Merry Christmas to all and a Blessed New Year!!!

Taking a breather

2008-11-18T10:25:00.004-05:00

THANK GOD!!!!!!

I have finally accepted that there IS too much that one human being can do and I overdid it in a big way in the past two months. It's a complete miracle (hence the thanking to God) that I am not (a) recovering from a stress-induced heart attack; (b) in jail for attempted murder of someone -- ANYONE -- who pushed my buttons at the wrong time; (c) sick with pneumonia again; or (d) huddled in a quivering pool of what used to be my emotional stability. No kidding... the last seven or eight weeks have been uncontrollably busy and stressful. And I missed the Phillies parade because I had promised to go into my son's class and do a Halloween craft -- 28 years and I'm playing with foam shapes with kids who are FLYING on sugar highs?!?!?!

Finally... since last Tuesday, I have a little space to breathe. Not a lot of space, but I don't feel as if I am choking from lack of sleep, too much work, too much politics, too much volunteerism, too many LATE nights where I don't even get home until after 10:30 and have to be up at 6 a.m. I somehow juggled it all (with help from some VERY awesome friends and with my oldest daughter helping occasionally with babysitting) and survived.

That being said... this is a QUICK post to say that I am going to take some "me time" whenever possible for the next few weeks. I had a manicure and pedicure last week for the first time since MAY. I sat and knit all day on Saturday while #4 was at a swim meet (getting his best time ever in butterfly). I was really productive in the crafting department -- I finished my babysitter's socks. I cast on Lissy's leg warmers. I cast on and finished Ryan's mittens. I cast on a hat for Ryan to match the mittens. I also am using a YUMMY new yarn called "Wisdom -- Los Angeles" which is a superwash sock yarn that feels NICE to work with, doesn't split and is really inexpensive (comparatively speaking of course).

I also got to go to NYC with my daughter and go see WICKED again -- that was also the day the Phillies won the World Series; there just aren't a lot of more perfect days than October 29th was. I got a new camera (had little choice on THAT purchase... most of my Halloween pics are horrid because I had serious camera issues). I have a massage and facial scheduled for the day after Thanksgiving too.

My sister and I played hooky last Friday afternoon to go to opening day of the new Bond flick -- Quantum of Solace. I'll give it 3 1/2 stars out of 5. DEFINITELY an improvement over "Casino Royale," but I'm still not sure about the moodiness of Daniel Craig as Bond. However, I haven't missed a Bond opening since the late 1970s and I was going to that movie. It was a nice treat to have my sister and I squeeze in 2 hours just with the two of us -- such time is virtually impossible for us. I had a BLAST!!!!

Politics.... obviously, I was not happy with the results of the election since I made my political positions quite clear. That being said, I was unsurprised by the results and I wish President-Elect Obama and his family well. This country was founded on the concept of coming together after an election -- perhaps BOTH major political parties need to do some work in that department -- if I, as someone who wouldn't have voted for Obama as dog catcher, am willing to be bi-partisan and give him a chance, other people need to do the same. I think 95% of the people who are supposed to be our "public servants" need to grow the heck up and stop throwing tantrums and power games.

So.... today it's off to court, lunch (working) with my best friend, a bar association function and then a GOP meeting.

I never said I would COMPLETELY slow down.

WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!!!!!!!!!!

2008-10-30T09:28:00.005-04:00

And on a COLD... very cold... October night in 2008...

I am still on Cloud 27 (three times the ultimate exaltation). Yesterday was as close as one gets to perfection in Life.

My oldest daughter had gotten me tickets to go to NYC to see Wicked so we went to the city (AND I got several hours of fabulous knitting time in on the bus -- a yarn I dyed myself that I am making into socks for my babysitter with blue yarn, shot through with red!), came back and I got her home and me home (she has her own apartment) and FLEW in the front door to join DH and #4 as the lead-off Phillies batter hit a double to start the bottom of the 6th inning. We watched, we prayed, we stopped breathing and then...

In a pitch that was SO reminescent of 1980 (Tug McGraw possessed Brad Lidge, I am convinced of it), it was over. We actually sat there in mommentary shock -- it was probably under 3 seconds -- and then started yelling (I started crying which confused #4). The horns in our quiet, suburban neighborhood started going. I continued to cry and #4 hugged me. The city went WILD!!!!! The trophy was presented.

Spur of the moment, I decided to go to a local Modells to get our shirts last night. I called, they said they had plenty and would be staying open until 2 a.m. I threw jeans on (already had a Phillies T-shirt on) and drove out of the house to Modells. The parking lot was FULL, there was a LONG line. I had no coat on (so I lost all sense of sanity -- we're all getting that part, right?). The shirts sold out.

This morning, in my normal routine, I dropped of #4, picked up #1, took #5 to her sitter and then #1 and I went and spent a WHOLE lot of money at Dick's Sporting Goods. They were wonderfully organized and deserve credit for their customer service. We are wearing our shirts. There are hats for my older boys. And there is a PARADE DOWN BROAD STREET tomorrow!!!!!

Of course, this IS Philadelphia.... parade on Halloween...? Ummmm... I am due at #4's school at 1 to help with the party and to do a craft. That is a big old MAYBE right now!!! Waiting to get the older boys' plans before I pull #4 out of school for the day -- there will be other Halloween parties; but one thing we've learned in Philadelphia -- ENJOY THE MOMENT!!!!

To the Phillies organization... the managers, players, coaches:

THANK YOU!!!!!!!

YA GOTTA BELIEVE!!!!

2008-10-27T08:38:00.004-04:00

A long time ago.... in a city not so far away... there lived a 16 1/2 year old girl (ok... she lived in the suburbs, but that's unimportant). Despite a lot of family adversity a few years earlier, she was a happy teenager whose life spread out in front of her. She had 2 good knees and good grades in school and a father who loved her very much. He loved her so much that he turned her into a rabid Eagles fan (and football in general) and who LOVED baseball; more the Yankees than the Phillies, but we lived here so we cheered for the Phillies as our National League team. A long time ago, women were not brought up as sports fan, but this girl's father had two daughters and no sons so it was up to him to break the mold (as a single father in the 1970s) and teach his girls all about the rules and the players; what a first down meant and why a pitcher would walk the bases loaded with one out in the bottom of the ninth inning. On one glorious October day in 1980, Tug McGraw (rest his soul) threw a pitch and the Phillies won the World Series. Then in January of 1981, her beloved Eagles beat DALLAS to get into the Super Bowl. The Eagles lost, but the girl was happy they had gotten there at all; especially against "America's Team" (SNORT!!!!!).

The years went by. In October of 1981, the girl's left knee exploded from within. The girl found out that she couldn't go to the college she had always planned to attend, but her father couldn't afford. The girl had a not-so-fabulous first marriage but one which produced two amazing children. The girl met and married the most wonderful man in the world in October of 1988 and baby #3 followed in mid-September of 1989. The girl went to law school and did pretty well. In 1993, the girl and her prince watched almost every Phillies game, believed their team could win and watched Joe Carter of the Toronto Blue Jays smash that dream.

Then the girl's father started getting sicker and sicker, but the girl and the Prince had baby #4 in February of 2001 and that seemed to perk up the girl's father some. The Eagles started winning -- a lot -- the girl, her father, her sister and her prince were all very happy. Baby #4 could sing the Eagles fight song before his 2nd birthday. On a cold Christmas Eve in 2003, the girl's father succumbed to his illness and the girl was sad; so sad it took her almost a year to cry over her loss. In January of 2004, Donovan McNabb threw the pass of his career -- 4th and 26 against the Green Bay Packers -- the girl was elated but understood Brett Farve's sadness at losing HIS dad the same week she lost her father. Of course, this IS Philadelphia so the Eagles blew it the following week against Carolina in the NFC Championship game and the girl turned 40 two weeks later... still no Philadelphia championship.

There was a brief hint the next year. The girl tried SO hard to maintain her Philadelphia Pessimism when the Eagles made the Super Bowl in January of 2005. She even alowed herself to believe the Eagles might WIN the Super Bowl. But then McNabb choked (no surprise to the girl by the way) and the Dream sputtered again. By now, her older kids were starting to understand what it means to be Philly Fans -- that also made the girl sad.

And then there was 2007... the Phillies won the NL East and the girl allowed herself, just for a moment, to believe again that it COULD happen. The Colorado Rockies yanked that particular rug away quickly. Philadelphia fans were cheering for a horse named Smarty Jones and for the Philadelphia Soul (GO SOUL!!) because to be denied a championship for a quarter century was unbearable. Even the dumb horse lost. The Soul won, but the victory was very hollow. The girl's right knee was injured in the Summer of 2008 and is still injured three months later. She works so hard. She takes care of her family (with MUCH teamwork with the Prince). There is still just a little something missing though...

Or is there? The Phillies are the 2008 NL East champs. The Phillies are the National League Champs. The Phillies are now up 3 games to 1 on the Tampa Bay Rays (who???). The girl has been viciously tamping down ANY hope for days, weeks and years and finally, at 6 a.m. this morning, gave in to the DREAM. The girl is exhausted from work, political obligations, the Prince's grad classes leaving her solo, bad knees, a sore tooth and simply no time to just sit and knit. BUT for the first time in decades on a Monday morning (I despise Mondays), the Girl is allowing herself to believe. She believes that Rollins, Utley, Howard and Cole Hamels can get it done. The rest of the country may not be watching, but here in Philly, there is an exhileration in the air -- you can breathe it, you can smell it, we ALL know it (even those of us over 40 who are trying SO hard not to be disappointed again).

For the first time since that glorious Fall day, twenty-EIGHT years ago, I believe. For the first time in so long, I am again that girl with two good knees, good grades and her life spread out in front of her like a banquet for her to pick and choose from as she sees fit since that 16 year old girl never gained weight. It's 1980 all over again and I can taste it. The Eagles won yesterday, Penn State won Saturday night AT Ohio State. Even the Girl's Temple Owls won their football game last week. The girl's oldest son was on Homecoming Court this past weekend for his college (he didn't win, but we went up in the pouring rain anyway).

The girl may be middle-aged and creaky in the morning, but there is still that core of pure joy underneath all of the cynicism that Life has added to her existence.

The core is waiting to explode.... the joy is bubbling beneath the surface of my fingertips like a persistent tingle that will blow out of my body tonight, or Wednesday or Thursday night. This morning, I stopped fighting the bubbles.... I know I shouldn't because, as a Philadelphia sports fan I know better. It's there nevertheless. It's palpable. I can taste it and most importantly I know that YA GOTTA BELIEVE!!!!!

LET'S GO PHIL-LIES!!!!!!!!!!

The past month, beliefs and nature's beauty

2008-10-15T08:34:00.004-04:00

So I am SURE that there is a song title somewhere that I could use as a title for this post -- something about the conflict between beauty and exhaustion or magnificence and mundane. After the last several weeks, I'm just too exhausted to think.

We last left my blog with me defending Senator McCain's choice of Sarah Palin as his VP nominee. That support may have wavered after the Katie Couric interview, but I still support the GOP -- more so now since I don't get how it's somehow ok to say that one is still going to spend an additional fortune on new spending when the market freefalled last week and real middle class americans have either lost their savings or don't know if they're going to be able to get student loans for their kids for next year's college tuition -- remember, real middle class parents don't qualify for grants or even subsidized student loans; only less "wealthy" people get those types of aid. I am positively sickened by the lack of leadership by President Bush, both presidential candidates and a Congress that spends trillions of taxpayer dollars to give money for "children's wooden arrows" in a so-called rescue package that has no constitutional basis AND which fails to try an recoup the costs by getting the bonuses back from those who took them. Fiddling while Rome burns... that's where I am on the economic issues.

Instead of venting forever about that though, I want to turn a bit upbeat. DH and I celebrated our 20th anniversary on October 1st. Not only does he get kudos for putting up with me for 20 years, but he got me a GORGEOUS ring and we went to Niagara Falls for a long weekend. The majesty of those waterfalls and their awesome ability to change rock into a gorge astounded me. It's one thing to see pictures or videos -- QUITE another to see them up close and personal on the Maid of the Mist. We also went to this amazing conservatory where the Niagara Parks commission has created a rain forest type environment called the Butterfly Conservatory. THOUSANDS of butterflies, flying around, landing on you -- the experience was almost as mind-blowing for me as the Falls themselves. The weekend itself was crazy (I'm still recovering in many ways) because we went on a bus tour and it was HURRY, HURRY, HURRY the whole weekend. However... 9 hours each way on a bus...? Audiobooks on the iPod and the portable DVD player I had gotten for DH for anniversary...? I made a sock and a half for DH and am actually now within a few hours of finishing the second sock if only I could find five minutes to knit!!!!

Work has been miserable. I knew that this month was going to be high-intensity -- just a lot of deadlines all at once which happens sometimes but is still overwhelming -- but when I have already worked 30 hours in 2 days this week...? "Overwhelming" seems like a mild word. I also had to have this darn right knee drained again last week. It swelled up out of control for no reason on Tuesday night and my orthopod took one look and pulled out the big needle. Have to say that since the injury took place on July 18th, the knee thing is getting a LITTLE old at this point. DH is also taking two grad classes between now and the end of the month to get to his Master's plus Thirty (it's a teaching thing) by the end of March so he's out every Friday night and all day each Saturday and Sunday which leaves me on full time Mommy Duty but with other obligations and meetings and events that are sucking me dry emotionally and physically. Besides working full time, there isn't a single night this week where I don't have an evening commitment.

HOWEVER... speaking of commitments for this evening. Yes, I have a swim club board meeting. Yes, I am DVR'ing the debate. But tonight is ALL about the PHILLIES!!!!!!!!!!! I am known for talking about football -- let's not complain more in this post; the Eagles are KILLING me this year LOL -- but I have also been a Phils fan since the mid-70s. I remember so well the National League Championship series (plural) with the Dodgers in the late 1970s. I remember beating the Cardinals to make the World Series. I remember Tug McGraw throwing that final pitch in October of 1980 to beat the Kansas City Royals and the jubilance that WAS Philadelphia in the weeks and months that followed (then the Eagles made it TO the Super Bowl and beat Dallas to get there... 1980 was an AMAZING year). I was 16 at the time and remember every moment like it was yesterday.

I want that feeling again. I want to celebrate my wonderful region which has been denied a championship in any major sport since I was barely pregnant with my 24 year old daughter (76ers... 1983). After the Phillies made it to the World Series in 1993 and lost and then the strike came the next year, I just couldn't invest the time or emotion into watching every game as I had done in 1993. I had a law practice starting. I had three (then four, then five) kids. I went to a couple of games as late as 2000, but I only had so much sports emotion to give and, when forced to make a time choice, the Eagles have always been my first love. I took the position of "I am not following baseball" out of a sense of emotional protectionism. Of course, I have a son who lives, sleeps and eats sports so I always knew what was happening. Finally, last year, the Fightin' Phils won the NL East and I allowed myself to dream, once again, of that wonderful Fall of 1980 when I had two good knees, good friends and the Phils and the Eagles were kickin' ass and taking names. For a few brief days, I allowed myself to believe that I had a right to that feeling once more. Then the Phils got their butts whipped by the Rockies and the Eagles didn't make the playoffs -- I was SAD and swore to myself that I would be a fan, but that I would never again let myself BELIEVE.

But to be a Philly fan is to ALWAYS believe; to BE invincible, to know there is ALWAYS next year. Nationally, we are besmirched, belittled, laughed at and insulted. We're the people who threw snowballs at Santa Claus. When national commentators talk about our teams, we are almost ALWAYS placed 2nd to Dallas or the Cubs or anyone else who has a marginal claim at being better. We're the gang who doesn't shoot straight or the fans who are always the bridesmaids. Not believe????????????? Not in Philadelphia, my friends.

LET'S GO PHILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why I support Palin

2008-09-13T10:02:00.003-04:00

Unlike some out there in the blogging universe who choose to only "publish" their own point of view and therefore disregard and dismiss the view of others, I am happy to allow dissent from my opinions. I'll even answer the comment posted below on the "Hear me Roar" post by Beth.

First of all, the comment seems to belittle my education and state that I must at least have gotten through law school and have some sort of education so I'll address the presumption that somehow only stupid people are supporting Governor Palin's VP candidacy first. I graduated from Miss Porter's School in Farmington, CT in 1982 -- you may have heard of it since it's ranked as one of the best schools in the country and was attended by Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis and also by other notable authors, artists, educators, businesswomen and leaders for more than 150 years. I was not in the top two of my graduating class, but my grades and SAT scores, along with a vigorous extracurricular, athletic and community service schedule were more than sufficient to get me into pretty much any college I wanted to attend.

Much of my senior year in high school was not the experience I wanted though. In late October of 1981, I suffered a devastating knee injury to my left knee -- long before replacement surgery was possible and very early in the days of arthroscopic surgery. The vast majority of my senior year was spent in a hip-to-toe plaster cast along with two very painful surgeries -- one in late October and one in late January of 1982 a few days before my 18th birthday. Miss Porter's had something called a Long Winter Weekend each year so I was able to come home to PA for my 18th birthday. While driving me back to school on Feb. 6, 1982, my late father explained to me that we didn't qualify for financial aid at the college I really wanted to attend and that I couldn't go there because my mother had taken a significant sum in their divorce settlement and was not required to help pay for my college education (actually, she was under PA law at the time, but I didn't know that then). The injury to my knee was severe enough to limit any ability to attend college on sports scholarships -- 27 years later I still limp occasionally and a new injury to my right knee eight weeks ago has wreaked havoc on my life.

So I chose Temple University and started in the Winter semester of 1983. My late father was a bit chauvinistic and didn't think women could become lawyers so he thought journalism would be a good major for me. I started and did very well academically and met a man who would become my first husband (for a very short time). Like many 19 year olds in the early 1980s, I wasn't all that careful about birth control and became pregnant. I dropped out of college and had my oldest daughter 2 days after my 20th birthday. The marriage had no foundations so of course we tried to have another baby to salvage the marriage and when I was pregnant with my 2nd child, I returned to college to major in history. #2 was born one week before finals and I took those finals while fighting pneumonia that I had come down with postpartum. I pulled a 3.67 GPA that semester by the way. The ex and I were emotionally over by the time the Fall semester started in 1987 -- living in the same house, but that was it. I met my now DH that semester in an organic chemistry class. Ex and I officially separated before #2 was a year old and DH and I married in October of 1988.

I got pregnant again in January of 1989 and gave birth to #3, 19 years ago today. I had finished college pretty much minutes before he was born because I had AP credit from going to such a good high school and because I went to class in the summers so as to finish my degree in three years. I graduated cum laude by the way. #3 came a little early so I couldn't go immediately to law school since he needed additional care that only a mom could give him (and a dad -- DH and I have ALWAYS done equal parenting duties). In the meantime, DH finished college and started teaching at a wonderful private Catholic academy an hour from our house. Great school, VERY low salary. In the break period from my education (which I was paying for as was my husband), my younger sister gave birth to a baby with a fatal birth defect who only lived 16 days -- those days rocked my world and still do to this day. Meghan would have been 16 this past May.

I started law school in the Fall of 1992 with the weight of the world on my shoulders. My Meghan was gone, my husband and I were worried about finances, middle class families don't GET financial aid (because the definition of "middle class" is a joke -- one Senator Obama buys into hook, line and sinker) and my father's health was starting to fail. My ex husband would pop in occasionally to upset our family structure and my late mother-in-law suffered from health concerns that added more stress. I still did well in law school and we worked through the problems one by one; always struggling financially and dealing with problems that might have crushed other people emotionally -- there were some close calls, believe me. DH adopted the older two kids so the ex was now fully out of the picture, we stabilized my dad's health for the time and we learned to take time just for the 2 of us: there was NO extra money so we had "coffee dates" on our back patio every night.

I was lucky enough to be accepted into my law school's clinical program as a 2nd year student (not the norm) and also to get a lot of real world experience as a certified legal intern prior to graduation. I opened a firm with a friend when we graduated, but she wanted to make more money and joined a larger firm and I continued as a solo. For a very brief time in 2000, I worked for a mid-size firm myself, but then #4 came along and I went back to solo practice because being a mom was my first priority. The balance is possible -- especially with a supportive husband -- but I wanted to be there as much for our "extra blessing" as I had been and remained for the older three kids. My little guy went to the office on days I wasn't in court and was a familiar little figure in the courthouse as I filed documents and pleadings. On days where I was in court, he would be with my mother (until my sister's new baby was born and she just couldn't help ME out because Ryan was too big to lift -- funny, Julie will be 7 on Tuesday and she isn't too big for my mother to watch, but I digress) and then with the babysitter that we still use for our 2 year old. My children do not go to day care -- they are in a home-like environment.

Over the past decade or so, I have been belittled because I am a woman in the practice of criminal defense. Sometimes that derision is subtle and sometimes it is not so subtle. I have won major cases, I have balanced a family with my career, I volunteer on boards and politically and with the bar association and in my kids' schools. I have been a band parent, head cheerleading parent, head of my sons' summer swim team, I run my own small business (because sometimes the management of a law firm is more time consuming than the practice of law). I have done more fundraising for diverse groups than I can even count and frequently knit and crochet for charitable causes. I have an amazing husband who is a partner in every sense of the word. I have five children who are either self-sufficient, are becoming that way, are growing into independent little people or are just plain cute (that's the 2 year old). I am very comfortable in my own brand of feminism which I doubt meets the "rules" set forth by those who claim the term as their own.

What has Obama run? What legislation has he authored since he hit the U.S. Senate? What "change" does he offer for MY family? Let's see... I'm self-employed so I already pay double Social Security. College tuition assistance....? $4000 per year (for which we probably won't qualify) is a drop in the bucket when you are paying two college tuitions at the same time and my boys attend state universities and pay their fair share too. No solutions, only vague promises, on energy. No solutions, only vague promises, on the economy. I am not a racist, but if that man wasn't an African-American, he would not be at the top of a major party ticket. He's a cultural phenomenon -- and one which I believe was long overdue as much as I do about the gender gap -- but he has no substance or solutions. He is yet another in a long line of empty liberal suits -- long on rhetoric, short on reality.

The comment below also assumes that I voted for John Kerry in 2004. I didn't. It was the hardest vote I ever cast in my life, but I voted for Bush (the 2nd time around). Why? It's simple really..... because John Kerry was an empty liberal suit with no clue of what it means to be an average American who lives day to day. Like Kerry, Obama's values are not my values. For example, I would never, EVER expose my two younger children to a spiritual environment where racism and hatred and anti-patriotic sentiments might be spewed at any moment by a so-called man of God. I do not believe in denying an infant born during a partial-birth abortion medical treatment because letting that baby live is in opposition to the mother's choice to terminate the pregnancy.

Did I like the idea of Hillary on the top of the Dem ticket? Yep. Would have absolutely voted for her too. But Hillary doesn't represent my ideas or my political philosophy or my beliefs. She did offer concrete solutions to national problems though. The gender would have probably tipped the scale for me in her direction because I have concerns about a 72 year old president too. But the comment below about McCain "very likely could die in office within minutes of being elected" thus leaving us with a working mom who has run a state show JUST how much the McCain people have a stronger idea about what the middle class of this country really wants.

So why am I supporting Sarah Palin? That's easy. She's me -- with some different viewpoints although I share more with her than with the TOP of the other ticket. She's run a town and a state and a family. Is her gender a HUGE issue for me? Of course it is, but then there is a whole generation of Younger Baby Boomer women like myself who didn't have the opportunity to burn our bras yet still started our careers when women were automatically considered less than equally-stationed men. Once again, I am absolutely a feminist... with a small "f" rather than a large one. Palin epitomizes my generation and my personal life in many ways.

So to "Beth" below and to anyone else who thinks to demean me or call Palin's supporters "stupid" or want to refer to her ability to govern and manage her family as "inexperienced," I suggest you look to the TOP of your ticket and ask yourself what qualifications a 47 year old first term senator out of the Chicago Machine has to offer and what sort of "experience" he has.

And by the way... because my own life has taken twists and turns and not always been handed to me on a silver platter, I am going out of the country myself for the first time in three weeks when my husband and I take a three day trip to Canada for our 20th anniversary. That's all the time we GET to take because he's a teacher and I run my own business and our summers are dedicated to our 7 year old's swimming season.

Could I walk into the Oval Office and run this country tomorrow morning? You bet I could -- because NO ONE is truly experienced when it comes to that particular job and it's a matter of listening to one's advisors and applying that information to the facts and circumstances of a particular situation. Why do I support Sarah Palin? Because, if she needs to, I believe that she can process that information and make a better decision than any of the other three candidates on the two major party tickets.

She is woman.... hear her ROAR!

I am WOMAN, hear me ROAR!!!!!!!

2008-08-30T17:16:00.006-04:00

I keep thinking I am going to come down from the emotional high that I have been riding since late yesterday morning -- nope, not yet. I woke up this morning and Sarah Palin really IS the GOP nominee for Vice President of the United States. Finally..... someone got "it" and realized that is far past time for a woman to be considered as a valid candidate to hold the highest office in the land. The Democrats can scream and whine until they're blue in the face that Governor Palin isn't "experienced" enough for the job? What experience does the TOP of their ticket have? With all due respect to Senator Biden (and I mean that very sincerely since I believe Joe Biden to be a good man), Senator McCain hasn't lost the "Experience Argument" by picking a sitting governor.

For months and months, I have been a truly undecided voter. Somewhere back in February, I realized that Hillary Clinton (a woman I admire tremendously despite disagreeing with her on almost every important issue) was going to be eviscerated by her own party and by the media long before my own GOP ever got a chance to do it. Senator Obama is new and "sexy" and all about CHANGE (whatever THAT means; he's never defined it) and Hillary was going to get thrown out on her face. I watched over and over as new barriers were erected before the first qualified woman to ever run for the presidency: "She has to win Ohio and Texas." She did. "She has to win Pennsylvania by 10%." She did. "She has to win Indiana and Kentucky and West Virginia." She did. None of it mattered -- Hillary Clinton won the NJ primary on my birthday by approximately 20% of the vote; at the "roll call" (or the Demise of Democracy which is the better name for it) this past Wednesday night, New Jersey "casts all 127 of its delegates for Barack Obama." No... they did no such thing. What a farce. I was quite literally devastated watching a qualified woman get raped on national television by a bunch of people who claim to support women's rights.

And then came Sarah Palin. I had heard her name buzzed several weeks ago but after watching what happens to women in politics, I wasn't really thinking McCain would look twice. My only concern, after watching Obama and his people publically crucify Hillary, was that so long as Mitt Romney wasn't on the ballot, and assuming PA was going to be close, I would vote for Senator McCain because I supported him in 2000 as an honorable man -- he was NOT my first choice as all of you know. Had Mitt Romney been on the ticket, I would have written in Hillary or voted for Bob Barr from Georgia. That's what made me undecided -- there was never a question after the DNC convention and Obama's disrespect of Senator Clinton that Obama would get my vote; that wasn't happening.

And then came Sarah Palin again... yesterday morning very early, I knew the VP was not Romney. WHEW!!!! I don't like that guy at all. I guess I'll vote for McCain. Hmmmm... they're buzzing Tom Ridge's name. Puts PA in play. I guess I'll vote for McCain. Governor Palin is still in Alaska (this was about 10:30 yesterday morning) so it CAN'T be her. That's ok... Romney isn't the VP. I guess I'll vote for McCain.

And then it WAS Sarah Palin for VP!!!!! I watched her introduction with tears streaming down my face and my hands clapping together like a little girl. As each new detail came out, I became more excited to the point of sheer joy. Look... she's 44 like me -- ok, I'm six days older than she is. She's got five kids like me. She's been married to her husband for 20 years like me (almost... October 1st for us). She's a teacher's daughter and her husband is in a union. She is JUST like me!!!!!

I do not agree with Governor Palin's views on every topic but I have always known that I would never wholly agree with any one person -- how boring that would be! She is a marvel though; a force of nature. I have no doubt that Sarah gets "it." I am so on board that my McCain sign is actually up in my front yard and I gave money (and with our tuition bills, money is hard to come by!).

The last few weeks have been brutal for me and it feels wonderful to feel good again. My knee is healing, my knitting projects are flying off the needles (because I still can't walk all that comfortably yet), my over-active 7 year old goes back to school on Tuesday and the Eagles open their 2008 season one week from tomorrow -- my fabulous Eagles socks from my hand-dyed yarn that I colored will be done tonight. Life is stabilizing as it always does.

But perhaps it takes a working mother of five to understand that.

I wonder if she's a knitter??? I bet she is. It's COLD in Alaska!!

2008-08-29T11:40:00.002-04:00

I am over the moon with excitement to the point that I can barely type!! A 44 year old woman who is NOT from Washington DC with 5 kids with an age range like that of my own children. After watching Senator Clinton get raped on national television in order to put forth a candidate for whom I could never vote and being faced with a GOP choice that I was not thrilled about, John McCain has just come through HUGE!!!!!!! She is smart and athletic and downright beautiful. She has executive experience and is NOT a Senator.

McCain/Palin in 2008!!!!!!!

Ravelry Olympics

2008-08-14T08:49:00.004-04:00

So.... I had to add these "medals" for the Ravelry Olympics. I finished my new cable hat in two days (from cast on to finishing) and finished the felted bag for myself (a modified version of the Booga Bag pattern) which I absolutely LOVE and have already crammed all my stuff into!!

I also saw my orthopedist yesterday and do NOT need surgery on my right knee (Thank you, God). I do need to wear a brace (and a matching one on the right because the strain on my bad knee over the past four weeks has been pretty bad) and do physical therapy, but the relief at NOT needing surgery was monumental.

Have been working all week to catch up from the staycation, but managed to get to the pool last night and swim some laps (arms only, but got a good work out). TOnight is Knitting Night and I am very excited to spend some times with my friends and to swap some yarn.

Staycation plans not quite what I planned

2008-08-07T12:51:00.003-04:00

So..... somehow and with a LOT of stress, I survived last week. I got done everything that I knew needed to be done prior to me taking a week off from the office (HAH!). Had the custody hearing from Hell on Friday afternoon and was waiting to go get the MRI on my right knee when the phone rang LATE Friday afternoon or maybe it was an email -- can't quite remember now. It was another lawyer advising me that, despite a verbal agreement, his/her client had decided to play custody blackmail games with my client. THAT consumed part of Friday afternoon AND part of Monday (when I wasn't supposed to be working). Whatever... it will be fixed next week or it won't and I'll need to file an emergency petition with the court. I really hate game playing!

Then... got called into court for Wednesday morning and when I was on my way to take the littlest ones to their sitter's house, got a call cancelling. All fine, but they wanted to go to their sitter's (who they hadn't seen in more than a month) and I figured I would get a day of scrapbooking and quiet time in. Not so much. My doctor's office called at about 11:40 a.m. with the MRI results. Without going into depth about fluid pockets and bulges and degeneration of cartilage, suffice it to say I'll be seeing my orthopod next Wednesday. It was a very emotional and traumatic phone call for me and I spent half of the day crying. Knee may or may not be surgical, but it's my good knee... or at least it used to be.

I'm still getting around, better with the brace on. More importantly I did NOT cave in to my almost irresistible impulse for a pint of Dove ice cream last night. I bought myself a book, took the kids to the pool and hung out with a new and AWESOME friend from knitting group, ate a dinner within my weight watcher's points, watched some "West Wing" and went to sleep. I kept telling myself that there is NO point in letting this drag me down and I'm tougher than my knees are.

I'm also really excited to cast on my cabled hat for the Ravelry Olympics tomorrow morning. I taught myself to cable FOR this project, made a baby hat and a hat for Jenny as swatches and am really excited to actually make something for myself for once. Yarn is a MUCH better addiction than food (even if it's a tad more costly). Picture of Jenny wearing HER hat is above. You may notice that it's green, not purple -- that's because the initial hat I made with the wrong type yarn and too-small needles didn't fit. Go figure. Of course, I have absolutely NO sense of size or depth perception, so I didn't KNOW it didn't fit her until she tried it on. Luckily, I can add the purple baby-sized hat to the gift bag I've finished for a friend and his wife. One more baby blanket/sweater/hat to go. Then, until MY kids have kids... I am done knitting for other people's babies. I think I felt obligated to do 12 sets this past year and my holiday knitting is woefully behind.

No song title comes to mind -- just too tired

2008-08-02T07:52:00.006-04:00

SOOOOOOOO tired. SOOOOOOOOOO glad the past month is over. SOOOOOOOO excited that I am not going anywhere NEAR the office next week for any reason except to check mail maybe once -- I think I would have a nervous breakdown if I walked in the doors.

Haven't posted in more than a month. My days have been filled with a crazy amount of work and my evenings and weekends with summer swim team, chores, meetings and generally feeling overwhelmed. My little guy started the swim season very strong, but ended up with Lyme DIsease (and a case of the 7/8 year old lack-of-focusitis) so his earliest times were his best times. He is finally almost done the antibiotics, but sheesh!!!!! Then there is my knee.... no, not the bad one, the other one! I stood up to make an objection in court two weeks ago and felt something go POP -- had MRI last night at the end of the most awful and grueling week I have ever had.

However, in the midst of all that.... I taught myself to cable this past week and ended up (without intending to) making the toddler a purple hat to match her purple sweater. I finished a BUNCH of projects from baby hats to baby socks to afghans and found a top-down, seamless sweater pattern that WOrks!!!!! I also went to a yarn dyeing and made myself hand dyed sock yarn.... WAY fun!!! Today, I'm going on a yarn crawl (that means a trip to multiple yarn stores!) with a friend from knitting group which turned out well since the weather today is not pool conducive.

Those of you on Ravelry need to cheer me on in the Knitting Olympics which start Friday, August 8th at 8 p.m. It's really cool -- cast on during the Opening Ceremonies and finish by the Closing Ceremonies. I am making a cabled hat (which is how Jenny ended up with a hat -- was teaching myself HOW to cable and ended up with a toddler hat!) for myself. If I finish it sooner, I'll join the work-in-progress team and finish some projects.

I also, despite the knee preventing much exercise, have lost close to seven pounds. I went back on Weight Watchers at-home program as soon as tomatos were cleared for human consumption. And then I found "SparkPeople". OMIGOD!!! It's a free web site that lets you track food, read articles, use message boards, get motivation and support. I had heard about it from a client about 10 months ago and for some reason, the name stuck in my mind so when I wanted to go back on WW but didn't want to pay for their monthly website, I joined Spark and have been religiously logging in every day, tracking my food, etc. As soon as I started tracking my portions, the weight started peeling off... five of those pounds are in the last ten days. So I'm getting healthier and feeling damn proud of myself!

But finally and most importantly.... I am officially on vacation for the next week. I'm not going anywhere, but am NOT going near the office. Hubby taking a grad class and even though my sitter is available, I need to spend a week with my babies and away from my clients and other lawyers. Next week is that week -- Thank God.

A new skill !!!

2008-06-21T21:22:00.003-04:00

I felted. All of you who know me have lived through this for the past several weeks either in person, in email or on Ravelry. I was afraid to felt because the thought of taking lovely, non-washable yarn, making it into something and then deliberately destroying the fiber was incomprehensible to me. So I made the bag and then it sat on my nightstand for several days. A friend finally sent me a message that basically said "Oh for goodness sake, Bonnie.... PUT THE DARN BAG INTO THE MACHINE." Of course, she's a sweetheart so she said it much more nicely.

Bag went into the washing machine in a pillowcase. Went through 2 cycles and came out BEAUTIFULLY. The only difficult part was actually threading the shrunken I cord through the holes in the bag. Picture of finished project is above.

Other picture is of Melissa (oldest kid) with the bag. I had put it in the car in case I needed to go right from work to Thursday night's knitting group. She saw, she took. I brought a picture to knitting group! Since she reads this blog regularly, I am stating for the record that (1) the new blue/green bag I am working on is for ME; (2) Aunt Kim's bag gets done next; and (3) Melissa's matching cell phone case that I am designing now will need to wait until all these baby gifts are done and distributed! Love you, Brat.

Felting is FUN!!!!

Working for the Weekend

2008-06-14T14:44:00.005-04:00

ok... I'm officially old when I am using Loverboy songs as blog entry titles -- it may even be more geeky than all my musical songs.

The previous week has been exhausting. It started off SO hot (and really did NOT cool down as much as I would have liked it to) and SO busy and SO stressful. But, to quote Gloria Gaynor, I will (and did) survive. Luckily, Montgomery County is one of the few counties left in America that still has a vacation day for Flag Day (we LOVE Flag Day!) so it was a short week since the holiday was given on the 13th to make up for the actual Saturday date.

Thursday night was the bar association's annual Clam Bake -- a GREAT event (if such a thing can be said about a function with all lawyers and judges) with good food, nice conversation and a 5 hour open bar. Even surprising myself, I only had 2 drinks because it was pretty hot and (even though hubby would have come over to get me), I didn't feel like being hungover Friday. Had a great knitting conversation with an attorney with whom I haven't always had the greatest relationship with -- probably more my fault than her fault because I don't enjoy Family Law and I tend to get a little nasty when I'm doing it -- not only does she knit, but she knits BEAUTIFULLY. I also got to tell other crafters about Worldwide Knit In Public Day (today) so I spread the word and encouraged more people to be public yarn addicts.

I spent Friday with two of the kids. Jenny and I went to GOP HQ to help out for a couple of hours and then Chip and I went to lunch and to finish Father's Day and birthday shopping for my wonderful man (whose birthday is Tuesday when I'll be at a bar association dinner). Last night, I vegged! I was supposed to be at a Beef-n-Beer for a PA House representative candidate, but the older boys were out, we had no sitter and I just could not spend another night away from my husband -- one of us was out every night this week. Since Mark couldn't go, I skipped the event.

I put the time to good use though. I finished (end weaving) on the felted bag. I finished AND wove in the ends on the pedicure socks for ME. I wove in ends on the blanket for Ryan's kindergarten teacher from last year (since he only has 2 more days of school). I cast on a baby hat. I knit and wove ends until about 1:30 a.m.

The week ended ok based on how it started, but I wouldn't want to end this week without paying tribute to the late Tim Russert of NBC News. When Mark called me on his way home and told me the news of Mr. Russert's passing (since I usually come home and watch Hardball on MSNBC, he didn't want me to find out), I felt physical pain. Anyone who knows me or reads this blog knows that I am a political junkie -- and despite my affiliation with the Republican Party, I consider myself to be willing to listen to ideas and to know the truth rather than the spin. I watch and listen to both liberal and conservative radio and TV, but Russert (along with George Stephanopolis of ABC) always helped me put my own beliefs into perspective. I didn't always agree with Mr. Russert, but his dedication and patriotism and old-fashioned values have always impressed me. I truly don't know who will fill his shoes as people sort through the decision to be made this election cycle -- there is no one I trust to ask the hard questions now that this giant has gone to be with the angels.

Finally (and I know this is a ramble), I want to say a big THANK YOU to all of the employees at the Spring House Clemens (it was NEVER a Giant to me) and the branch of my bank and to wish them luck in their future endeavors. At 6 p.m. tonight, the grocery store will close after 35 years of local, community-based retailing to the people of Ambler, Lower Whitpain and Lower Gwynedd. My son will be on the clock until the doors are locked. When Clemens opened in 1973, my parents and I were among the first customers in the store. Today, with the shelves mostly empty and the corporate honchos pulling the remaining items out, I shopped at Clemens for the final time. It made me miss my late father terribly. It made me realize that my once close-knit community has become incredibly suburban. But most importantly, it was the end of an era where customer service and friendly employees were the norm rather than the exception.

I miss the days where being nice was expected rather than being looked upon as strange. I miss knowing everyone in my neighborhood (where we are going to the Block Party in a few minutes, but where we have had tremendous turnover recently). I miss the sense of stability that turning on the TV to a familiar face giving me the news of the day and where people say what they mean but do so kindly. I guess I'm as anachronistic as I was once called by a former friend, but the one thing this week has taught me is to stay true to what I believe in and let the rest of the world do as it pleases.

No good deed goes unpunished...

2008-06-10T21:36:00.003-04:00

Yep... I'm an absolute geek for a musical. This title is from Wicked (where my FABULOUS daughter is taking me in October in NYC!) and is a song about how other people perceive your actions -- it's a truly fascinating song and I love to sing it in the car. Jenny prefers "Defying Gravity" and "Dancing Through Life", but once in awhile, I insist. She's 2 and I control the CD player ('cept it's hard to hear MY songs if she's throwing a fit).

Anyway... this title describes how I have been feeling for weeks and certainly since the Heat from the Fires of Hell set in on Saturday. I'm like a hamster on a freakin' wheel or the Energizer Bunny. Days pass and speed by and I suddenly look up and say "it's Friday?!" I am incapable of saying "no" to a volunteer task -- even when I know that the person asking hates me and will be mean to me for no reason other than that I get the volunteer task done. If I have food poisoning (or a stomach bug or WHATEVER that was last Wednesday) and I can't make a meeting, I feel guilt in the extreme because I have volunteered to do a job and it MUST get done. When people complain about being asked to do ONE or two things and respond "I can't commit," despite the fact that EVERYONE else does 10 times the work, I want to smack them -- I resist the urge, but I get furious. I have SO much work to do and files to review and briefs to write and clients to yell at for failing to communicate with me. Gas costs too much money and there is NO short term solution (despite what anyone from any political party tells you -- it's crap). People drive like complete maniacs. Did I mention I hate the heat?!

I equate sanity with knitting time and stay up late even if I have early court just to "give" myself some peace. Of course, I also knit in court (between the six hearings I did today), at restaurants, at the swim club and anywhere else I happen to be. I was so tired today after the hearings -- the heat wipes me out when it is anything much over 80; 114 heat index today was not tolerable -- and Jenny was still going to be napping. I went to Crafty Me Yarns and sat on the floor in my white suit, pulled out my Booga Bag and aimlessly knit and chatted with the owner for somewhere around an hour. I was finally and simply dysfunctional. The bag is going to be cool though!

"If I cannot succeed, Fiero, saving you, I promise no good deed will I ever doooooooo..... A-GAIN"

OK.... ready to go to bed now. Have more court in morning.

Memorial Day relaxation

2008-05-25T19:47:00.003-04:00

The anticipation on Friday didn't begin to supercede the reality. For the first time in months, through a winter that included the loss of family and friends, through persistent illnesses (and accompanying steroids), through not loving my career as much as I used to...

Through it all is the anticipation of summertime and Beachcomber. Being with family and friends. Being able to be myself. Watching the kids thrive in the sunshine and fresh air. Even though I had work to do (swim team registration) and the water was SO cold in the big pool (which Jenny insisted she needed to go into), I feel human. I finished her pick socks. I worked on Ryan's green "Eagles" sweater. I talked with friends who understand it is normal to sit and fondle each other's yarn skeins, who understand that I simply cannot talk about the new case, who believe that being part of a community is crucial to children's develoment (i.e. if someone else sees my 7 year old getting in trouble, they don't wait to get me... they tell him to behave).

Tomorrow is my full free day at the club. No swim team registration, no duties. Just me, my family and some yarn!

Officially Summer !!!!!!!!!!

2008-05-23T18:39:00.004-04:00

I live for the next three months despite my hatred of the heat and humidity.

I love the freedom to forward my office calls to my cell phone and to access my office laptop remotely from the grounds of my swim club -- usually without my clients' knowledge although some of them catch on. I love sitting under a big tree with sunshine peeking through the shade. I love the smell of chlorine on everything and the sound of small groups of people chattering, singing, scolding their kids for running on the pool deck or just watching them enjoy the environment. I love watching how much Ryan's (#4) swimming has improved over the winter (since hubby takes him to winter swimming). I love the slower pace and reduced stress that being at Beachcomber brings to me after a heinous winter and a horrific week.

At 12 noon tomorrow, the grounds open. At 1 p.m., the pool opens. It's going to be sunny and warm and not hot. The pool will be freezing cold since it has rained every day this week and I will absolutely go in the pool. My game plan is so simple -- just for once. Jenny has swim lesson (at the YMCA indoor pool which will not be ice cold) at 11:45 a.m., we'll come home after that and I'll head to the pool because I don't know how to say no and agreed to coordinate swim team registration. From 3 p.m. on (both Saturday and Sunday and ALL day on Monday), my time is my own for the next few days.

Jenny will need to be chased and prevented from eating sand or climbing on the "wheel of death" (merry-go-round), but that's part of what makes summer special. Ryan is easy -- he never remembers from year to year how chilly the water is -- he plans to take his "deep water test" and disappear with his friends into the trees; coming out now and then to ask for food from the snack bar. We'll have chicken marinating in the fridge (and then in the cooler) with a side of the best Caesar Salad on the planet (which serves all of us -- it's HUGE). Fresh fruit for snacks and everyone shares with everyone and watches out for everyone.

Thank God... my Peaceful Place opens in a few short hours.

And the drama begins...

2008-05-21T07:33:00.002-04:00

I am currently trying to function after a LONG day and anxiety rush yesterday. I have a new client who is accused of some pretty bad stuff. Any of you in the Philly area probably saw partial shots of me on the news --all stations. I spent a day in the pouring rain getting bail set and paid and then being chased by tv cameras to the point that I almost ran them over with my minivan (I really DID show tremendous restraint in NOT doing so) as I took my client from district court to the police station for processing after bail was posted. I made the mistake of watching the news and just got mad at the DA (and she's a friend of mine and doing her job, but I still got mad), madder at the press and wondering if maybe I shouldn't have run them over with my minivan!

When I finally got home, there were press calls to return (just to say no comment – it’s WAY too early to comment) and then realized that I had left something I needed to work at home today (no babysitter) so I went back to my office at about 7:30 p.m., got home about 8 and wanted to knit. I looked at my knitting and crocheting projects and sort of shrugged my shoulders and said “eh… not interested.” All day I was thinking that I wished I had at least brought a sock to work on during the "hurry up and wait" process and then when I DID have the chance to knit, I quite literally couldn't hold needles or a crochet hook.

I woke up this morning coughing and feeling chilled (hmmmm… maybe because I was in and out of a damp, chilly rain all day???). I have loads of work here with me, but may just cuddle with the toddler and knit after getting seven year old on the bus in a few minutes. I’ll work while she naps later.

The Princess Birthday

2008-05-18T08:33:00.004-04:00

I promised myself (and hubby) that I wouldn't go TOO crazy on Jenny's birthday this year. She's only two and we didn't want to do a big mob scene of a party since she really doesn't like big crowds (which even our immediate family was last night). My oldest daughter, Melissa, and I went shopping before knitting group (and Melissa learned to knit Thursday night!!!!!!) and it truly didn't seem as if I was buying THAT much stuff and I didn't spend a tremendous amount of money.

We all know where that lengthy explanation is going. There is a picture above of the presents on the coffee table before Jenny unwrapped them on Friday night -- not including presents from Melissa and Mike and our close family friends who came over last night. She went batty! Loves her bathtub and cradle for her babies; she actually gave her Baby Arielle a bath, bottle and tucked her in. She particularly loves her tiara, necklaces and cell phone from Chip and Melissa and her tea set that I picked out. She is a GIRLY girl and it was just too much fun shopping for her. My husband thinks this year was bad???? Next year, she can have Barbies!!

I also finished her purple sweater (picture above of that too) at 11:51 p.m. on the night before her birthday. The sweater is actually for the Fall so it is supposed to be a little big -- it was made by combining the Incredible Top-Down Raglan pattern and a men's sweater pattern from Knitting to Go. Basically, it's a percentage top-down sweater. I also made Jenny 1 1/2 socks from handspun and dyed yarn I got in a yarn swap -- very cute although not machine washable which means she won't wear them much.

I plan to be a complete veggie today -- have a rough day tomorrow and am working on a short week since my sitter is unavailable for three days and then it's Memorial Day weekend. I also need to finish up the registration stuff for swim team, but can't do so until practice times are set so that's starting to be a LITTLE stressful just because I would like it to be finished. Next weekend will be ALL about the club opening and swim team registration and then I travel the week after that.

Gracious.... my life IS a bit busy!!!!!

What a rare mood I'm in...

2008-05-05T20:03:00.002-04:00

The title of the song is "Almost like being in love," but that has NOTHING to do with this post. I'm just in a strange mood and I started singing songs from Brigadoon while typing up ENDLESS reports. I am always in love, but that's not the current mood.

Since last Monday, I feel as if my life has exploded out of control. Absolutely nothing horrible has happened (well... other than the bronchitis from my allergies, falling onto my bad knee and #4's front 2 teeth being knocked out yesterday). I am simply overwhelmed. The boys are coming home from college later this week. Their "big stuff" had to be brought home this past weekend. I have no baby sitter for six work days in May (and a 2 day conference in Harrisburg for another two days). I have suddenly become very popular as an attorney (I guess since I have seven new cases since a little over a week ago) which has quintupled my work load.

My swim club is opening (pool not until May 24th, but Open House, swim team registration organization meetings, legal work, etc.) which is the only thing keeping me going right now -- you haven't lived until you have spent a warm, sunny afternoon at Beachcomber Swim Club, sitting under the trees, watching kids play, knitting with friends. I survive winters, knowing BSC is there every Spring and Summer. I also get to go to my knitting group this Thursday night since I missed a week sick and then last week with political meeting stuff. I am looking forward to 4 hours with nice people and uninterrupted knitting time (or crocheting).

I finished the baby blanket for my son's kindergarten teacher from last year. I have despaired of finding a FAST knitting pattern for blankets so I I always crochet them. This pattern was fantastic -- Lion Brand Yarn Diagonal Baby Blanket is the name (I think). HATED the yarn (Lion Homespun) because it split every which way, but the finished product is soft and really pretty. I'm going to cast on another tonight because if I don't get some SERIOUS knitting time in over the next few days, my family is going to lock me in a padded room with needles, yarn and my iPod. Besides, another friend had a baby on April 8th; I knew they were due, but I've been so darn scattered that I forgot to call and ask.

I also bought a new crocheted afghan pattern book. I decided it was time to mix up my crocheting a little and make something new. Oldest daughter's afghan is WAY ratty and #4 hasn't had anything "in progress" for quite some time. I was going to make him wait his turn, but the teeth thing yesterday made me change my mind. He's such a sweet little boy and he was so brave about the whole thing until his friends were gone. Thank GOD they were baby teeth -- albeit ones that weren't ready to come out.

So my mood has improved by just typing all this out. Love this blog thing.

Post PA Primary musings

2008-04-23T09:48:00.003-04:00

I have never been prouder to be a Pennsylvanian than I was last night. I was at my polling place by 6:30 a.m., left at 8 a.m. to do nine preliminary hearings, came back around 1 p.m. and stayed until closing (8 p.m.) and vote tallying (around 8:45 p.m.). In the meantime, my husband, sister and oldest daughter were texting results to my cell phone because at the polls and at the GOP after-primary party (where 3 glasses of cabarnet were probably a bit much on an empty stomach), we didn't have political TV access -- we had access to the Flyers game .

My rant last weekend about politics was dead on politically. Voters in PA came out in record numbers (25% of GOP voters at my poll turned out for a completely uncontested race; 77% of the Democratics were out). Despite the 2 Democratic committee people being overtly for Senator Obama and Senator Clinton having no one to speak on her behalf and no literature at the Democrats table and attempts by the Obama camp to have them vote for delegates committed to Obama rather than to Clinton, the vote was tied between them on the machine balloting (he won by seven votes on the absentee ballots). The Catholic, working class Democrats came out after work, bypassed us Dirty Republicans, ignored their own committee people (who were trying to harass every voter into their camp), went into the polls and gave Senator Clinton a victory in Montgomery County. It was the same ALL over the county which had been trending Senator Obama's way for weeks in the polls.

Late deciding (within the last week) voters were overwhelmingly for Senator Clinton -- Obama's comments offended them for exactly the reasons I stated over the weekend. The national media (specifically CNN and MSNBC which were my daughter and sister's channels they were sending me information from) refused to call the race for Clinton until almost 10 p.m. Fox called it around 9:05 p.m.) By 8:30 p.m., it was obvious she had beaten him and done so badly. In my district alone, before 5 p.m. and knowing who had and had not voted, he should have won by 100 votes out of 489 potential Democratic voters. By 7:30 p.m., I saw the reaction of the late voters and knew she was going to come close Obama had lost overall in the Commonwealth.

Not that I get a say in this because PA is now done and I'm from the other party, but someone needs to remind the Super Delegates of how a President is selected in November. It's called the Electoral College and it's arcane and ridiculous, but it's what we got. I couldn't sleep last night because I was overtired so I looked at the electoral math (I know... I'm a geek) and not counting Florida (which I think is a moron move for the Democrats), Senator Clinton's states vs. Senator Obama's states electors is an interesting number. In fact, I heard a new poll this morning that shows Clinton ahead of McCain in MA, but Obama losing to McCain. Perhaps the solution to this delegate quagmire should be that each state's Super Delegates must vote for the person who won the state -- sorry Senators Kennedy and Kerry, but your voters chose Clinton, not Obama. Ditto to Senator Casey in PA. In the Fall, every state is "winner take all" and, by the way, Obama is NOT going to win in Montana in November.

It's fascinating being on the outside edges of this thing -- watching it but not participating. Pundits are dumb because they do the same thing I accused Senator Obama of doing -- telling people HOW to form decisions rather than listening to how those decisions are actually formed. The voters get to do the interviewing, not the candidate. The only math that counts is in the electoral college in November.

But hey... what do I know? I voted for Govenor Huckabee .

The Cat in the Hat Comes Back

2008-04-20T09:51:00.004-04:00

Note: The pictures are completely irrelevant to this post -- it's Jenny in October of 2007 (at about 14-15 months) in her Penn State cheerleading outfit after she learned "Jenny... do Eagles touchdown." The 2 pics are sequential and taken one after another.

This is a LONG, LONG post -- I have some venting to do. Read on if you dare....

The life of a lawyer can be crazy. The life of a mom can be crazy. The life of a political volunteer can be crazy. The life of a knitter can be crazy and projects do NOT always work as planned. When all of those "hats" that I balance are worn in a stack on top of my head, they are bound to topple over eventually. I suddenly had a mental image this morning (or was it late last night) of the beloved Dr. Suess character taking hat after hat off his head, revealing a bunch of little cat helpers to clean up a pink spot and spreading it everywhere around the house and yard. If you remember the book from childhood, the image describes this past week. If you don't remember the book, re-read it... it's fun.

The lawyer hat started out of control and got worse with each passing moment. I walked in Monday morning to a voice mail FILLED with messages from my client that makes me crazy. Finally, by Wednesday, I found the three hours I needed to write a 4 page single spaced letter to him/her, explaining AGAIN the status of his/her case. When I went into the office yesterday (Saturday), there was AGAIN a long message (left at 7 something on Friday night) asking the same questions answered by the letter (which s/he acknowledged receiving). I wrote and mailed a three sentence letter saying "what part of 'you need to communicate with me in writing' was it you don't understand? All information has been provided to you ad nauseum." The letter didn't put it QUITE that bluntly, but it came darn close.

The week also involved dealing with an opposing counsel who thinks her client is a perfect individual and my client is therefore evil. Never mind that her client is a deadbeat parent, refuses to follow court orders and cares nothing for the child involved other than at his/her convenience. Never mind that the lawyer thinks she is God's gift to the court system and it is apparently beneath her to answer numerous letters and emails. Monday of this coming week is going to start with me filing a petition or two that basically plead to the court that I've had it up to my ears with the lawyer's and her client's holier-than-thou attitudes -- I have enough ammo lined up to bury both of them and my patience is gone. I tried to be nice. I tried NOT to bring this case back to court, but apparently this lawyer is more interested in billing her client than she is in watching out for the child's best interests or negotiating on her client's behalf. I can play it either way she wants it, but I think she will be sad when I'm done with her. I think her client will be sadder. I think the child will be better off.

This is a non-stop frustration for me in practicing law. It is completely counter-productive to refuse to work with the opposing attorney in the long run. On a criminal case, if I have discovery in a prompt manner, I can analyze the strengths and weaknesses, decide what to file by way of pre-trial motions or IF such motions are appropriate and negotiate a plea if one is appropriate. No..... depending on which ADA is assigned, I need to chase down discovery, be lied to by young ADAs, have promises made regarding pleas that aren't put into files before the young ADA goes away on a vacation to Puerto Rico and then I need to spend HOURS with the (very nice) ADA who knows nothing about the case. In family law, the frustrations quadruple because the vast majority of domestic attorneys are more worried about their billable hours than about the most expeditious way to finish a case.

The political hat was a mild distraction as far as time, but a HUGE distraction as far as where my brain kept drifting. I'm a PA Republican so I am not part of the insanity that IS the PA primary. I had a quick meeting on Thursday night (right in the middle of my knitting group, of course) to pick up signs and handouts for April 22nd. I have to be at the polls for 13 hours on this coming Tuesday when MAYBE 10 Republicans (out of over a thousand registered) will bother to vote because we are completely uncontested. I'll be able to knit all day.

I did, however, watch the debate on Wednesday night and am flabbergasted by the reaction to it by the media in the days that followed. I'm sorry... at what point did it become "unfair" to ask someone who wants to lead this country who he hangs out with??????? I am a moderate Republican (and more importantly, I am EXTREMELY opposed to continued U.S. presence in Iraq). There are a lot of moderate Republicans and Independents and conservative Democrats and undecided voters who have never once seen Senator Obama questioned in a debate about that horrid minister, about a 70's era terrorist who is apparently friendly still with the Senator, about comments he made which call people "bitter" because they believe in the 2nd Amendment and God. What would the Super Tuesday primaries and caucuses (held on my birthday by the way) have looked like if the debate this past Wednesday had been held on January 15th?

I repeat: I am a moderate and I want our soldiers and marines OUT of that quagmire in the Middle East. That being said, while I would absolutely consider voting for Senator Clinton on the war issue alone (I have other problems with her, not the least of which was her Bosnia "misstatement"), the debate showed me that in the Fall, I will have no problem voting for Senator McCain if Obama is the candidate. It isn't that I believe Obama to be a bad person because quite the contrary is true; it is that I think Obama (and the media) believe HE gets to decide what is or is not important to the voters he wishes to represent. I am offended by the very concept of that attitude.

Keith Olberman, Dan Abrams, Bill Maher, Rachel Maddow, Howard Dean (loser in 2004), John Kerry (loser in 2004), Ted Kennedy (loser in 1980 and we won't even DISCUSS his affiliations over the years; Game of Bridge, Senator?), Jimmy Carter (loser in 1980 also) and Donna Brazille (who is apparently allowed to re-define words like "fairytale" into a racial slur and who claims to be uncommitted as a Super Delegate.... snort!) do not get to tell middle-class America what issues SHOULD be. I could care less WHO the question came from about Obama's terrorist friend. I am not at all perturbed that ABC News spent half the debate on "non-substantive issues" or "the politics of personal destruction." To the contrary, after 15 months, this was the first time I saw anyone in the media ask these candidates hard questions about issues that will be important to voters like me in November. I have watched every debate for both parties since last year. There has not been a single point where Obama has articulated a specific plan for how he will address MY issues.

I've checked Senator Obama's website (and Clinton's and McCain's) because I really WANTED to drink his Kool-Aid. A choice between Senators McCain and Clinton would be difficult for me -- a true "undecided until the last minute" scenario. A choice between McCain and Obama is no longer difficult for me -- you don't get to insult my Commonwealth, disregard real middle class concerns and continuously try to gloss over serious issues with "hope and change" instead of concrete solutions. You also don't get to wiggle out of questions about the details of your economic plans that might very well raise my taxes -- I pay enough already. You don't get to tell me that you sitting in a church for 20 years with that minister and exposing your children to his hatred (or the potential of that hatred) shows good judgment. You don't get to tell me that your relationship with William Ayres is the same as your relationship with a GOP congressman -- the terrorist was instrumental in starting your political career; the GOP congressman was not; the terrorist said after 9/11 that he wished he had done more to blow things up -- you still are "friendly" with a person like that?!

Oh wait... that isn't supposed to matter because this election is about "change". Dear Senator Obama: it matters to me and I was more than willing to vote (not decided, but willing) for you until 2 days ago. How DARE you tell me what "should" or "shouldn't" matter? The President and all other elected officials (including myself because I am on the ballot as a low-level committeeperson on Tuesday) answer to the people; not the other way around.

Like I said... no actual time, but lots of emotional time on that one.

There was also the Knitting Nightmare... Jenny's pink sweater simply didn't work out as planned. She grew, the pattern had problems so I ended up ripping back the whole neckline, crocheting a scalloped border as a neckline so she can wear it and casting on a new sweater (in purple). I didn't cast that sweater on until I spent HOURS measuring her, combining patterns, doing math calculations to create my own pattern calculator and knitting several swatches. That being said, the purple sweater is turning out wonderfully well -- the yoke is done, the sleeves are on holders and I'm knitting down the body. It fits over her head beautifully (which is where all was wrong with the pink sweater) and she's watching me make it, knowing it's for her (because I keep putting it on her). I also got a new crochet book called "48 hour afghans" which holds some promise.

Finally the Mom Hat... the baby is still suffering from a nasty stomach virus which came on VERY quickly on Friday morning, in the car. I had court at 8:30 a.m. and her sitter was fine with her being there. By last night at 5:15 p.m., she had a 102 fever and by 8:20 (with Motrin only 3 hours in her), the fever was 104. We called the doctor who said to keep cooling her off and pushing fluids (which keep coming up and out) and that 105 would be the tipping point when she needed to go to the emergency room. Her fever is mostly gone today and we've gotten some applesauce into her, but we are EXHAUSTED and she is cranky.

We did have a nice dinner with all five kids last night though. The older boys were both home from college and eldest daughter came over too. It's really rare we have the whole gang without others -- I love my daughter's boyfriend and all the other assorted people who come over for holidays, football games and birthdays, but once in a little while, it is really special to just be the 7 of us!

I ran errands for hours yesterday and need to take one of the boys back to college this afternoon. The upcoming week is going to be nuts. I need a long weekend away with my hubby, my knitting and the soundtrack to "Braveheart" !!!!

Saturday Laziness

2008-04-12T19:57:00.003-04:00

Today was delightful. I took Jenny swimming and there was a bang of thunder about 15 minutes into class (and yes... they clear the indoor pool) so I took her to the Healthy Kids fair they were having at the YMCA, got her a banana to eat and a new beach ball, came home and was a SLUG for the rest of the day.

Let's see... I worked on Jenny's pink sweater (it's almost done which is good since it won't fit her for much longer!), took pictures of my UFOs (unfinished objects for those of you who aren't crafters), updated my Ravelry pages WITH those pictures and listened to a big chunk of "Deception Point" by Dan Brown (the unabridged version) while knitting. GREAT book to read/listen to.

I also took video of Jenny playing outside -- she's so darn cute! The Human Monkey Child has learned to climb the ladder on the swingset and wants to go down the big slide by herself. Problem is that it's a steep slide and she gains LOTS of velocity so hubby needs to grab her! She's a menace.

Warm, Dry weather -- AT LAST

2008-04-11T08:42:00.002-04:00

I love Springtime. My allergies don't love the season, but there is nothing I enjoy more than that first day where the weather is warm enough to go sleeveless and the sun is shining. The aforementioned allergies kick in like clockwork on March 15th and last through mid-June. I've had severe allergies to Spring grass (and other early blooms) since I was 2 so I manage them and accept that they are what they are. HOWEVER, there is nothing more irritating to me than to have sinus pain, itchy skin and watery eyes and NOT be able to sit outside with the kids or to have to wear a coat (and I rarely wear coats). If I am going to be dealing with allergies, it needs to be warm and dry outside.

Yesterday was THAT DAY... the first one after the sniffling starts where I can change out of my business suit into a gauzy dress, where I can pick the baby up early and change her into a new tie dye sleveless dress without a sweatshirt, where my husband and I can after an after-work "coffee date" on our back patio while the baby gets muddy in the back yard and plays ball in the driveway with my next door neighbor (who has lived next door to me since I was 7; the kids call her "Aunt Kay"). That day where I forget to re-apply my moisterizer with sunblock and end up with a pink nose the next day.

This week started with me feeling pressured, overworked and unappreciated and ended with an afternoon in the sunshine and a new knitting group (1st meeting was last night) that is minutes from my home and an incredible group of knitters, crocheters and spinners -- people so talented that I would have felt completely inadequate except that no one in this group would ever make me feel that way.

It's amazing how one warm day can change a person's outlook.

A Very Long Week

2008-04-03T17:35:00.003-04:00

Some Mondays, it just doesn't pay to get out of bed. This has been one of those weeks. I'm tired, I'm emotionally drained, I've had little time for crafting and I have seven hearings, a committee meeting and a long drive tomorrow. I want to just go to sleep for three or four days! And I sound this tired AFTER a mental health day I gave myself today.

I spend too much time driving (Jenny doesn't love the driving either as can be seen from the picture taken Monday morning -- she really IS only 22 months old!). While I drive, my mind always wanders to what yarn I want to be playing with. I also sing -- Jenny only knows my bad voice so when Chip comes home and sings correctly, she gets mad at him.

I DID however hit the Sock Yarn sale at my newest favorite place -- Crafty Me Yarns. How perfect does it get...? Reasonable prices, beautiful choices, three blocks from my baby sitter's house and a wonderful owner who gave me tea when I really needed it on Tuesday afternoon. So the week wasn't unbearable (quite), but it was definitely LONG.

Need to go prep hearings now... THEN I can knit.

Four blankets for four friends

2008-03-26T21:10:00.003-04:00

They are DONE!!! All four of them -- two actually gifted BEFORE the babies were born and I can't be held responsible about the third one (baby is a preemie and I haven't seen her yet although she is doing very well).

This is the basic crocheted baby blanket I've been making for so long I don't know its source -- it's not written down anywhere. The mom for who it was made is someone I knew 20+ years ago (and through a really strange kind of dynamic) and then re-met about eight years ago -- maybe ten. We weren't friends two decades ago but are now. She is NOT the pink and lace type (I am after 22 years between my daughters), so I decided to make her something a little funky.

I'll use the extra yarn to knit new mittens for my niece -- she's way outgrown her ones I made her 2 years ago but likes them and won't give them up. I also added an Easter picture of all five of my kids -- couldn't for the life of me get all five of them to look at the camera at once, but it's a cute picture.

Random thoughts on time management

2008-03-24T19:05:00.003-04:00

I have always loved using what little downtime I have as "Craft Time." Crocheting, knitting, cross stitch (not so much now as I used to), painting little ceramic figurines and t-shirts -- so long as it doesn't involve me actually drawing something. I can't draw. I know HOW to sew (pretty well actually) and choose not to do so if at ALL possible. I started learning scrapbooking last Summer (2007) and really enjoy that too. But it's all about the time!

I bring my yarn with me everywhere I go. There is almost always a small project within reach or in the car. I find socks are a wonderful time-filler in between court hearings or while waiting for a trial list to be called. I always was opposed to knitting socks because I couldn't get past the idea that I could go to Target (pronounced in the French style) and buy them for so much less money. Then, I had minor surgery in September of 2007 on my wrist. I wasn't allowed to knit or crochet for a week (I wasn't supposed to write either, but I'm left handed and had about 15 hearings that week). It was also very uncomfortable for awhile after to knit anything with any weight so I bit the bullet, used a couple of books and a great website to teach myself how to knit socks and never looked back.

Summer swim practices and meets are a great time to work on afghans (usually crocheted). Crocheting is completely mindless for me -- I've been doing it forever. I could try and be moralistic and say something like "The Devil likes idle hands," but that's simply not true -- I just like to feel yarn in my hands and it's very soothing to K.I.P. (knit in public) because I can pretend that I'm focusing on a very difficult stitch when, in reality, I hate sitting around wasting good Yarn Time!

My kids and husband don't get it (my oldest daughter does a little since she is a wonderfully talented crafter herself). I've mentioned Ryan's love of all things knitted for him, but the others are just as "knit needy." Sweaters with hoods, gloves, hat replacement and just a hint of expectation that "Mom is going to make me something" that permeates the house on a regular basis. Of course, it would be uncool for the older boys to actually ASK for something and there is the ongoing Chip's sweater issue (STILL haven't found a pattern I like that doesn't require me to knit it up in pieces and sew!). Four friends have either just had or are about to have babies -- new babies should have something handmade.

The list is endless. I can't even take the time to list everything I need to make on Ravelry. BUT... the pair of pedicure socks I'm almost half done are for ME... not for the kids or the husband (ok.... Jenny is too young for pedicure socks and Melissa has a pair; the boys probably wouldn't want those)... mine, mine, all mine! I honestly can't remember the last time I made something for myself.

Going to knit now.

Easter Sunday

2008-03-23T15:40:00.002-04:00

I have had a delightfully sluggish day! Since Easter dinner is a pre-baked Honey Baked Ham and twice-stuffed potatoes, everything is already done so I took the opportunity to expolre On Demand movies and watched "The Interpreter" with Nicole Kidman and Sean Penn. REALLY worth watching and incredibly well acted. I also worked on my own pedicure socks since my daughter's pair was (reluctantly) placed into her and the boyfriend's Easter basket where they belonged.

As to the hat posted yesterday, it was knit from Charmed Knits which is a non-authorized Harry Potter knitting book. I picked it up last year because I thought I might make something for the kids, but the "beanie pattern" is the only one I've used so far. I love Harry Potter, but am really not into knitting "yarn cozies" or other things in the book. I have so many kids, family members and friends having babies that my knitting and crocheting tends more toward the practical.

Some notes on the pattern... I have made several of these (Ryan consistently loses his hats -- I keep meaning to get labels that say "handmade by... " so he can find them at the Lost-n-Found at his school) and I think the ribbing at the brim is too short. The hat tends to flip up along the ribbing because it's only an inch wide. I'm planning on making the beret for my niece (along with some mittens) so I plan to try a wider brim -- maybe 1 1/2 inches instead of only 1 inch. The pattern itself took less than 3 hours to knit -- it's done in the round on circular needles and double points at the top. Probably not a beginner piece, but advanced beginner/intermediate for sure. I prefer round knitting so it's a quick, "oh no! I forgot to shop yesterday" option. Who am I kidding??? I rarely forget to shop

I wish all of you a Blessed and Happy Easter... the picture is of little Jenny's face today when she found the Princess pail the Bunny had left her and discovered that Peeps make an AWESOME breakfast!

Easter Knitting

2008-03-22T22:46:00.001-04:00

My daughter's boyfriend has this hat he adores, but Melissa said it was getting ratty. So I grabbed some yarn at Lamb's Wool yesterday and knit this up. Also got yummy yarn for some other projects, but daughter reads this blog and one of the yarns is for a nice surprise for her so will post after it is done and gifted.

HAPPY AND BLESSED EASTER TO ALL!!!!!

The Long Weekend AT LAST

2008-03-21T09:13:00.003-04:00

I am on the verge of collapse. My game plan for the week had been to work through Wednesday and then take a long weekend when my hubby was off from teaching -- including Easter Monday when the kids will be back at college/in school but HIS school district has off. The best laid plans of mice and men.....

Monday: St. Patrick's Day -- walked into a maelstrom of clients who want things done NOW (that can easily wait about a month in most cases). Forgot my knitting when I had a three and one-half hour CLE (continuing legal education class) on the science behind the use of DNA -- parts were exceptional, but could have EASILY been knitting through it and still learning!

Tuesday: Protection from Abuse court -- the armpit of Family Law practice and was one of FOUR lawyers in a case and the only lawyer who wasn't billing by the hour -- need I say more?!?! Good thing I only go to PFA court once or twice a year.

Wednesday: Supposed to be the "wrap up day"; getting everything done so I could have a 5 day weekend. Got into the office before 8 a.m., checked voice mail and BLAMMO!!!! my day went to some dark place from which I could only pray that I could claw my way out. Because of the pre-eight phone message, I knew I wasn't going to be taking Thursday off; by my own choice -- it was an injustice fighting thing that was going to bring me to court the next day. Met with the client for Thursday, got the appellate stuff that was DUE done and filed.

And then the mail came bringing with it a document, dated March 6th, but not mailed until March 18th, with a 20 day deadline and a client who just doesn't seem to understand that the 13th amendment outlawed slavery -- mine. No, I will NOT call you back after 5 p.m. on Holy Thursday. No, I will NOT call on Good Friday for your convenience. No, I am not calling you on Saturday. Leave a freakin' number where I can reach you during non-holiday business hours and what part of "I MUST SPEAK TO YOU NOW OR YOUR CASE WILL BE DISMISSED" do you NOT understand?!?!?!?!? I have been representing (court-appointed -- I have not been paid a dime) this client for over a year and have been told by her/him that (a) I am required to have a secretary; (b) that he wants access to my home (unlisted) telephone number because I have her/his home number; (c) s/he is available on her/his schedule and I am required to contact her/him then. This whole blog could be filled with a rant against this ONE client -- I have never had a more difficult one.

Thursday: PFA Court again -- twice in one week???? Got a great result though. Couldn't reach the Monster Client despite having left a specific message that if s/he wasn't going to be available, a number needed to be left where I could reach her/him. Left new message (with my associate as a witness) that I would call back on March 25th between 8 and 8:30 a.m. and that the client needs to be available for my call. Had lunch with best (male) friend and cheated on weight watchers HORRIBLY -- that was one YUMMY lunch. Came home, finished Pedicure Socks for oldest daughter (including weaving in ends!!), watched "Enchanted" which was completely adorable and passed out.

Going to Millersville University now to pick up Kid #3 for Holy Weekend -- won't even get into my rant of WHY I have to pick him up at 11:30 a.m. on Good Friday and go to Mass in Lancaster County. That'll be a post for another day.

A Rare Movie Night

2008-03-13T08:31:00.003-04:00

With 5 kids and being nothing short of exhausted by the time I get home from work each night, it is an extremely rare night that I actually go TO a movie -- my DVD collection is enormous since we don't even rent movies but buy anything we're interested in instead. HOWEVER... my oldest daughter and I had both read the fabulous book, The Other Boleyn Girl, by Philippa Gregory and decided we were going to have a girls night out at the movies. Other than being really, really tired this morning, I cannot recommend this movie strongly enough.

The casting, cinematography and visuals were exquisite. Natalie Portman NAILED the part of Anne Bolelyn and Eric Bana was simply delicious as King Henny VIII. Scarlett Johansenn was adequate as Mary Bolelyn throughout the movie, but at the end, she was truly spectacular. Needless to say, to avoid a six hour movie experience (and since 1939 and Gone With The Wind, those don't happen), there were significant cuts made from the book to fit it into a 2 hour movie. Most of these cuts were ok and even those who have not read the book would be able to follow along. My sole criticisms are as follows: the character of Anne and Mary's mother in the book is quite the vicious, position-seeking, non-caring manipulator -- not so in the movie where Kristen Scott Thomas plays her as a sympathetic, early Woman's Rights activist who hates her husband and brother for the way in which the girls are used as political pawns. Secondly, the book has significant undertones regarding the homosexuality of the girls' brother, George, which are important to the storyline and also for the flavor of why Anne Boleyn was tried and executed by her husband's courtiers. Those undertones are eliminated completely from the movie.

All in all, a wonderful experience though and a fun time with my oldest daughter including a historical discussion of Tudor/Stuart history on the drive home. I laughingly said to my husband after I dropped Melissa off at her apartment and got home (at almost 11 !!!): "Omigod! Lissy ASKED me about history and was interested in the answer." I have been trying for almost 20 years to pour history into this girl's brain -- and all it took was a well-made movie???????

Pictures on Ravelry

2008-03-12T10:53:00.003-04:00

For any of you knitters and crocheters out there who DON'T know about Ravelry.com, you must check it out. For anyone reading who is on Ravelry, my name there is LwyrBabe (old AOL name -- REALLY old) and I spent a delicious morning off posting pictures and projects and things I want to/need to knit and crochet. It was a truly yummy break from work that I gave myself as an early Easter present since I'm not allowed Cadbury eggs while on Weight Watchers.

This picture is of Ryan wearing his "Eagles socks" -- I always have something on the needles and hooks for Ryan Patrick; he actually asked me within minutes of these socks being finished that he'd like a new sweater. When I reminded him (sort of jokingly) that he had two sweaters, a hat, mittens, two pairs of socks in just the last six months, he said "I know, but I like when you make me things." He's been moved to the back of the line. Melissa's Pedicure Socks are next to be done!!

My brain place

2008-03-11T09:21:00.001-04:00

so.... 5 kids, a busy law practice, a wonderful husband and enough volunteer duties to choke an elephant. In my mid-forties, not too bad a place to be. In fact, I'm proud of where I am in life even if sometimes I don't take time to appreciate it.

I want more -- we all have goals and aspirations and I definately have those. I want to be planning my oldest daughter's wedding. I want my two older boys to do well in school and to find good jobs that are close to home when they graduate college in 2009 and 2011 respectively. I want my youngest son to continue to swim well and enjoy being a kid. I want the baby girl to continue to be my little Princess-in-training. I want quality time with the husband -- doing nothing together.

Mostly, I want the days to be longer so I can spend more time with the younger kids and MUCH more time knitting, crocheting and other crafty stuff. I want to have time to sit down for a weekend and do NOTHING except work on scrapbooks for each of the children. The ideas are always flowing (mostly because I spend two hours in traffic every day of the week!), but the time to actually create the ideas is lacking.

My life is right where it needs to be but I want more. My daughters aren't the only princesses.